


Hold On, The Worst is Yet to Come

by lostresidentevilpotter



Series: What If? [8]
Category: Fear the Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-26
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-28 10:55:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20777408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostresidentevilpotter/pseuds/lostresidentevilpotter
Summary: On top of the ongoing threat of the Vultures, Al ends up at the Dell Diamond Baseball Stadium under Alicia's supervision, and Madison is pushed to the breaking point. Al/Alicia.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, I should be working on i know you feel it too (it all seems so untrue) but instead I wrote this side project. I have this completely finished, and I accidentally started another what if AU so yeah. Hope you enjoy it! Keep an eye out for the next AU and hopefully the end of i know you feel it too (it all seems so untrue).
> 
> The title of this story is from blink-182's song Mh 4.18.2011.

“Move! Out of the way!”

Madison pushes her way through the crowd gathering at the gates, pushes people aside until she reaches her kids, Luciana, and Strand. Alicia looks back at her, eyes wide, a lock of hair hanging free from her ponytail over her face. Madison quickly brushes it behind her ear then turns to Strand.

“What’s going on?” Madison asks.

“There’s someone out there,” Strand informs. “Someone besides the Vultures.”

Madison takes the binoculars from Luciana and stares out at the Vultures’ camp. She spots Mel, Charlie hiding behind him as he talks with a woman holding a camera. Madison swallows hard, binoculars focused on this woman. She’s doing most of the talking, waving her free hand around. Mel nods, smiles, then appears to wave her off, motioning in the opposite direction of the stadium.

“What’s happening?” Alicia asks.

“Mel’s talking to someone,” Madison replies.

“What’s with the camera?” Strand questions.

Madison hesitates. “Maybe you can ask her,” Madison says.

“Wait,” Strand says, grabbing Madison’s arm. She pulls it free impatiently and hands the binoculars off to Luciana. “You’re going out there?”

Madison straightens out her jacket and nods. “Stay here.”

*

Strand appoints Cole to act as a sniper and track Madison’s every move as Alicia takes the binoculars from Luci and trains them on her mom. She watches Mel turn, nudge Charlie behind him, and hold his arms out in greeting. The mysterious woman takes a step back, warily watching Madison approach – but then the woman’s face changes. Something akin to recognition flickers on her face, and she grins at Madison. Alicia can only see her mom’s back.

“What’s going on?” Nick asks.

“They’re just…talking,” Alicia answers. “I don’t know. That woman looks really happy to see Mom, though.”

“What?” Nick says. “Why?”

“You think I know?”

“You’re the one with the binoculars.”

“Guys,” Luci cuts in. “Knock it off.”

Alicia looks back for one moment, sending a piercing glare Nick’s way. He shrugs, smiling in that infuriating way of his, and Alicia turns back, raising the binoculars back to her eyes.

Alicia gasps, but manages to order to Cole, “Don’t shoot!”

*

She’s going to kill Mel. Madison decides this with a new certainty as she gets the journalist under the arms and drags her back to the stadium. She won’t let go of the camera, and Madison doubts she’ll be thrilled to leave the van parked closer to Vulture territory, but there are more pressing issues. Like the knife sticking out of her thigh. Madison just hopes the blade missed any major blood vessels – and hopes Naomi will be able to take care of this.

“Open the gates!” Madison shouts. The gates swing open, and Strand rushes to her side. “Grab her legs,” Madison grunts. “We need to get her to Naomi.”

“Who is she?” Strand asks.

Madison’s aware of all the eyes on her. Practically the entire community is gathered around, but Madison only pays attention to her kids. To the disgruntled look on Nick’s face. To the terrified look on Alicia’s.

“Someone I met,” Madison says. Strand nods and gets the journalist’s legs in his grasp. Together, they carry her to the infirmary. Madison’s glad she doesn’t say a word. Madison hopes Naomi is already there. Strand waits until they get the journalist on the bed to ask his next question.

“What happened out there?”

Madison shakes her head. “Ennis flipped out. Stabbed her. Mel’s not happy, and I think him and Ennis are going at it. I don’t know. We need to find Naomi.”

“I’m here,” Naomi says breathlessly, appearing in the doorway. “Give me space.”

Madison ushers Strand out and tells him to keep an eye on Alicia and Nick. She lingers in the corner, watching Naomi work quickly. The journalist stays quiet apart from occasional groans of pain.

“How bad is it?” Madison asks.

“The bleeding is under control,” Naomi says. “We’ll just have to watch it for infection.”

Madison nods. “Thank you,” she says. Then she turns her attention to the journalist. “I don’t think you ever told me your name,” Madison says.

The journalist yanks the beanie off her head and runs her fingers through her flattened hair before she offers up a small smile. “You didn’t tell me yours, either.”

Madison inhales sharply as Naomi goes to wash the blood from her hands. “Madison,” she says. “And you are?”

“Al.”

*

Alicia only waits an hour before she seeks out her mom. She figures she’s given her enough time to sort things out with the newcomer. Alicia expects Madison to still be in the infirmary, so she goes there first. She doesn’t bother to announce her presence, just strolls on in, but she skids to a stop when she realizes there’s only one other person in the room, and it isn’t her mom.

The newcomer blinks, sitting upright in her bed, legs stretched out ahead of her. And she isn’t wearing pants.

“Um,” Alicia says. She knows the newcomer isn’t wearing pants for a practical reason; there’s a bandaged wound around her thigh where the knife had been. The newcomer smiles as Alicia’s face heats up. “Sorry,” Alicia mutters. “I was, uh, looking for my mom.”

“She left a few minutes ago,” the newcomer says. “So you’re Madison’s daughter?”

Alicia sends the newcomer a strange look but nods. “Yeah. Alicia.”

The newcomer smiles again. “Al.”

“It’s, um, nice to meet you,” Alicia says. She points toward the door. “I’ll go. Give you some privacy.”

Al laughs and runs her fingers through her hair. “You don’t have to go,” she says. “If it’s because I’m not wearing pants, I can put some on.”

Alicia’s face reddens again, and she crosses her arms over her chest, unable to think of anything to say to that. “It’s okay,” Alicia finally says. “You just got stabbed.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Al says, smirking. She braces her hands against the bed and slides herself to the edge, swinging her legs off. Alicia’s eyes widen, and she rushes forward, holding her arms out.

“Hey!” Alicia exclaims. “Slow down! You can’t stand!”

Al pauses, her good leg braced against the floor. “I’m fine,” Al decides. Alicia stares at her in disbelief, hands still held out, as Al puts all her weight on her good leg. “See?” she says. “Totally fine.” At least until she puts weight on her bad leg. Then they crumble beneath her, and Alicia scrambles to catch Al before she hits the ground. Al grunts, clutching onto Alicia’s flannel shirt, face pressed to Alicia’s shoulder. “Sorry,” Al says.

“I told you,” Alicia replies, swallowing hard. She tries not to think about how Al smells nice. Clean. Cleaner than most of the people in the stadium, and they take regular showers. “You can’t stand.”

Alicia guides Al back onto the bed, makes her sit back down. Al looks up at Alicia and grins at the disapproving look on Alicia’s face.

“Thanks for not letting me hit the ground,” Al says.

Alicia nods. “Are you hungry? Did my mom offer you anything?”

Al laughs. “You don’t have to play hostess. I’m fine. Better than fine.”

“You were stabbed.”

“So?”

Alicia balks. “So? You were stabbed. If you want me to bring you something –”

Al waves her off. “Madison will be back soon, I’m sure.”

Alicia presses her lips together. She’s aware of Al’s eyes searching her face, and she takes an instinctive step back from the bed. “You looked like you knew her,” Alicia accuses. “When she went over to you. You looked like you knew who she was.”

Al tilts her head to the side. “I’ve met her before,” Al says. “We…talked.”

Alicia’s eyebrows pull together. “Why didn’t she say anything about you?”

Al shrugs. Before she can answer, Madison and Naomi enter the infirmary. They both stop in the doorway in surprise as Alicia whips around.

“What are you doing here?” Madison asks, advancing on Alicia and Al. She ushers Alicia away from Al, toward the exit.

“I was looking for you,” Alicia says. “Al just told me you’d left, but you were supposed to come back.”

“Well, here I am,” Madison says, smiling thinly. “Come on. We’ll go talk.”

“You better not be trying to stand,” Naomi chastises, motioning for Al to put her legs back up on the bed.

Al grins. “Of course I’m not,” she says.

She shoots Alicia a wink when Naomi and Madison aren’t looking, and Alicia blushes and hurries after her mom.

*

“I don’t trust her,” Strand says. “She just shows up out of nowhere, talks to the Vultures, and gets herself stabbed? Seems like a ploy to get us to let her in here.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Luciana says.

“I’m being realistic,” Strand replies.

“I agree with Strand,” Nick says. “I don’t trust her.”

“She seems nice enough,” Alicia argues. “And she said she knows Mom.”

Madison stiffens. She hadn’t expected Alicia to go to the infirmary, hadn’t even considered the possibility of Alicia talking to Al.

“We met,” Madison says. “We had one conversation. We don’t really know each other.”

Alicia, Luciana, Nick, and Strand look to her like they’re waiting for her to say more.

“And?” Strand prompts. “What do you think? Is she a threat?”

Madison inhales deeply. She hooks her thumbs through her belt loops and shakes her head. “She can be,” Madison says. “If she wants to be.”

“So what do we do?” Nick asks. “Throw her back out to the Vultures?”

“Absolutely not,” Madison says sharply. “She stays here. Why else would we build a community if we didn’t take people in?”

She has a point.

“But,” Madison adds, “I want eyes on her at all times. I don’t really think she’ll be a threat, especially while she’s injured, but I’ll appoint someone –”

“I’ll do it,” Alicia volunteers.

“No,” Madison says immediately. “Someone else.”

“Why?” Alicia demands. “I can handle it, Mom.”

“You know, I think that’s a good idea,” Strand says. “It’ll show everyone we’re serious about safety, having someone keeping an eye on newcomers.”

Madison shoots Strand a glare, and he just shrugs. “Fine,” Madison concedes. She points a finger at Alicia. “She’s your responsibility. If anything happens –”

“Nothing will happen,” Alicia assures her. “She’s injured and only armed with a camera. I’ve got this.”

*

Alicia didn’t realize that keeping an eye on Al meant every second of every day. This only becomes clear when the sun sets. Madison stops by the infirmary to check in with Naomi.

“She’s all set,” Naomi says. “She needs to stay off her feet. I was about to turn in for the night.”

“Me too,” Alicia agrees.

“Ah,” Madison says, smiling wryly. “You aren’t going anywhere, Alicia.”

“What?”

“Remember our agreement?”

So Alicia sets up a cot in the infirmary, close to the exit – blocking it, really. Even though it hasn’t been explicitly stated by anyone, Alicia can tell that Al knows what’s going on. Alicia drops her pillow onto the cot, spreads out a blanket, then turns back to Al.

“You all set?” Alicia asks.

Al, still, is not wearing pants. Now, though, she starts undoing the buttons of her shirt. “I’m good,” Al says. “Go to bed. I promise I won’t run off.”

“Very funny,” Alicia sneers. She tears her eyes away from Al as Al bundles her shirt up and sets it aside. Al’s tank top doesn’t leave much to the imagination, and Alicia doesn’t need to be called out for staring. “Goodnight,” Alicia says. The cot’s not nearly as comfortable as her bed, and if it gets any colder, her one blanket will be useless.

Alicia’s almost asleep when Al’s voice breaks the silence.

“Madison really didn’t mention me, huh?”

Alicia jolts awake, lifting her head and staring at Al through the darkness. “No, she didn’t,” Alicia says.

“Well, she didn’t know my name,” Al muses. “So I guess it makes sense.”

“I guess.”

Alicia puts her head back down on her pillow and closes her eyes. Again, she’s almost asleep when –

“She told me a story.”

Alicia grunts and pushes herself up into a sitting position. She brushes her hair out of her eyes and stares over at Al. “Should I stay up?” Alicia asks. “Are we having a conversation?”

“We don’t have to.”

Alicia sighs and rolls her eyes. “What story did she tell you?” Alicia asks.

“It was about a bird her children cared for when they were young,” Al says nonchalantly. Alicia’s blood runs cold, though, and she finds herself getting to her feet.

“What?”

“The bird’s name was Amina. Madison said she was so afraid the bird would die, but somehow, her kids managed to nurse Amina back to full health.”

“She told you –”

Alicia arrives at the side of Al’s bed, and Al sits up, a faint smile on her face. “It was you,” Al says. “Madison didn’t tell me your names or anything, but you’re her kid. It was you.”

Alicia’s lips part, and for a while, she just stares in disbelief at Al. “Yeah,” she finally says. “Me and Nick – Amina was ours.” Alicia shakes her head. “Why’d she tell you that?”

“Maybe you should ask her.”

Alicia shakes her head again and stutters for a moment before she manages to say, “That story – we aren’t those people anymore.”

“I know.”

“Then what does it matter?”

“Stories matter.”

Alicia presses her lips together. “Go to sleep, Al,” she says.

*

Madison stops by the infirmary early the next morning. She doesn’t sleep well knowing Alicia’s spending the night in the same room as a woman that’s basically a stranger. Madison steps into the infirmary, first looking to Alicia. She’s curled under a blanket on a cot, close to the exit, still fast asleep. Madison smiles to herself then turns her eyes to Al. Al’s asleep, too, but her covers are bundled up at the end of the bed, and Madison wishes she would at least put on a pair of shorts.

“Everything okay?”

Madison jumps and turns around, eyes landing on Naomi’s apologetic look. “Yeah,” Madison exhales. “Everything’s okay.”

Naomi nods. “Didn’t mean to scare you. I figured I’d set up for the day and check in on Al.”

Madison nods. “That’s a good idea,” she says. She clears her throat. “Call if you need anything.”

Naomi smiles. “I’m sure I’ll be fine,” she says. She claps Madison on the shoulder and steps past her. Madison’s eyes fall to Alicia again, and she can’t believe how young she looks in her sleep. Almost like the old Alicia. Something aches in Madison’s chest, but as she leaves the infirmary, she reminds herself that this is why she set this community up.

The Vultures can pry it out of her cold, dead hands.

*

Alicia sleeps in the infirmary for the next six days, and thankfully, she doesn’t have another late night chat with Al. The fact that she knows about Amina – that Madison told her – bothers Alicia, but she doesn’t bring it up with Madison. She doesn’t tell Nick, even though she has plenty of opportunities to when she visits him in his gardens. She doesn’t tell Luci, either, because that would take too much explaining. She just thinks about it periodically.

On the third day, Al reluctantly puts a pair of sweats on. It’s a minor struggle. She can’t stand, but she swings her legs off the edge of the bed and gets the sweats up to her knees before she stops.

“How am I gonna do this?” she asks Alicia over her shoulder.

“I don’t know.”

“Will you help me?”

Alicia snaps her book shut and drops it onto her cot as she gets to her feet. “Only put weight on your good leg,” Alicia decides. “Hold onto me, and I’ll get them up, okay?”

Al nods. She does as she’s told, putting all her weight on her good leg. She grasps onto Alicia’s shoulder to keep herself upright, and Alicia manages to pull the sweats all the way up. She helps Al sit back down then steps back.

“See? Piece of cake,” Alicia says. “And you’re finally wearing pants.”

Al grunts. “I think it’s bothering Madison that I’m spending the night in a room with you while I’m not wearing pants.”

Alicia rolls her eyes, but her face flushes. “I doubt it,” she mutters.

Al grins. “Then maybe she just has a problem with me.”

“She could’ve thrown you back to the Vultures,” Alicia points out. “Or she could’ve never brought you in here in the first place. I don’t think she has a problem with you.”

“She’s having you keep an eye on me every second of the day,” Al counters.

“Safety reasons,” Alicia dismisses. “Once you’re back on your feet, you’ll be a full member of the community.”

“So I’ll get my own place?”

Alicia hesitates. “Actually, I don’t know. We’re building more apartments, but…”

“But?”

“They aren’t finished,” Alicia admits. “And they won’t be for at least a few more weeks. Maybe months.”

“So am I stuck in here until then?” Al asks.

“No,” Alicia laughs. “You’ll be out soon.”

“Where am I gonna go?”

Alicia doesn’t have the answer to that question, so she just shrugs. “Wherever my mom puts you.”

Al frowns but accepts this answer for the time being.

On the fourth day, Al complains about needing a shower. Alicia brings her a bucket, a rag, and some soap and tells her to get to it, but the look Al gives her suggests that this is not a viable solution.

“You can’t stand,” Alicia reminds. “How are you supposed to shower?”

Al smirks. “You can hold me up the entire time.”

Alicia hates that her face burns red. “No,” Alicia says.

“Come on. I know I’m starting to smell bad. Naomi keeps looking at me funny.”

Alicia motions toward the bucket. “I can give you some privacy,” she offers.

“Right,” Al snorts. “You’ll be right outside the door.”

“Take it or leave it.”

Al takes it, and Alicia only goes back into the infirmary when she’s called. It’s strange, seeing Al in the clothes Madison had brought in for her. It’s just a plain black shirt and sweats, and Al rolls the sleeves of the shirt halfway up her forearms as Alicia steps back in.

“Aren’t you getting tired of spending nearly every minute of your day in here with me?” Al asks.

Alicia shrugs. “Only sometimes.”

“Madison really doesn’t trust me, huh?”

Alicia blinks. “It’s just protocol.”

Al smiles. “Sure.”

*

Jeff takes a nasty fall, and Al is expedited out of the infirmary to make room. Madison approves the move early on Al’s seventh day in the infirmary, when she’s just barely beginning to attempt to put small amounts of weight on her bad leg. Madison’s afraid Jeff might have broken his back in the fall, and she’s not sure Naomi will be able to do much for him. She bursts into the infirmary with Naomi and Luciana at her side, Strand and Nick carrying the gurney they got Jeff on just behind them.

“Wake up!” Madison announces, startling both Alicia and Al out of their slumber. “You need to move,” Madison commands. “Now.”

“I can’t walk,” Al grunts.

“We’ll take care of you in a minute,” Madison promises. “You just need to get out of that bed first.”

“Did something happen?” Alicia yawns.

“Jeff fell,” Madison explains shortly. “Help Al get up. Nick and Strand are carrying him in now.”

Alicia jumps up, kicking her cot out of the way, and she holds an arm out to Al, helping her from the bed. Al keeps all her weight on her good leg, leaning heavily against Alicia to stay upright while Nick and Strand lift the makeshift gurney up onto the bed. Jeff groans, and Naomi moves in quickly.

“I can’t – I don’t think I can feel my legs,” Jeff whispers.

“Try to relax,” Naomi tells him.

Madison’s eyes lock on Alicia and Al. Her eyes narrow. “Nick,” Madison says coolly. “Help Alicia get Al to her room, please.”

Nick nods and takes up Al’s bad side. Together, Alicia and Nick help Al out of the infirmary. Madison watches them go until they disappear out the door then turns to Strand.

“How do you think Alicia’s going to take the news?” he asks.

Madison cracks a smile. “Hey, she asked for it.”

“You aren’t worried?” he questions.

“Of course I am,” Madison replies. “But she’s right. She can handle it.”

*

“Wait,” Alicia blurts. “She’s my _roommate_?”

“You volunteered,” Madison reminds her.

“Yes, but – but it’s been a week!”

“And she’s not fully healed, and you know we don’t have any open rooms yet,” Madison points out. Alicia huffs, but she’s having a hard time arguing. “If you don’t think you can handle it –” Madison adds.

“I can handle it,” Alicia cuts in. She just isn’t sure she wants to anymore. It’s not that she doesn’t like Al – it’s that she does. Being trapped in the infirmary for a week with her was one thing, but _living _in a _small room _with her? Unbearable.

“Good,” Madison says. She grasps onto Alicia’s shoulder then whispers, “Just give me one minute with her, okay?”

*

Madison enters Alicia’s apartment and spots Al seated on the edge of Alicia’s bed. She looks up, bangs hanging in her eyes until she swipes them aside. Alicia’s apartment is small for one person, let alone two. The bed takes up a good amount of space alongside the desk shoved against the far wall, next to a full bookshelf and a dresser. Al’s camera is on the desk with Alicia’s butterfly knife. Madison shuts the door behind her and leans back against it, arms crossed over her chest.

“Madison,” Al greets warily. “I’d stand, but you know.”

Madison smiles. “I know.” Madison’s eyes flick around the room. “I’m sure Alicia won’t mind sleeping on a cot until you’re well enough.”

“I can sleep on a cot,” Al says. “Alicia doesn’t have to give up her bed.”

Madison hums. “You and Alicia can sort out the sleeping arrangements. I’m here for a different reason.”

“Yeah?”

Madison nods. She closes the distance between them quickly, grabbing a fistful of the front of Al’s shirt. Al startles, holding her hands up in surrender; she doesn’t dare to try to fight Madison off. “Listen to me, and listen closely,” Madison growls. “If you do anything, _anything_, to hurt her, I will gut you. Do you understand?”

Al blinks. “I – yeah. Yeah, I understand, but…I’m not going to hurt her.”

Madison nods. “You better not,” she warns. She releases her hold on Al’s shirt, and Al smooths it out, unable to wipe the shock from her face. “I don’t bluff,” Madison adds. Her hand comes to rest against the hilt of the knife hooked to her belt, and Al’s eyebrows raise.

“You have nothing to worry about,” Al says.

“Good,” Madison says. “Because I don’t want to gut you, Al.”

“But you will,” Al finishes for her.

Madison smiles. “But I will.”

*

“I’ll bring you a cot,” Madison says as she steps out of Alicia’s apartment. “You and Al can fight over who has to sleep on it.”

Alicia nods and watches Madison walk off. She enters her apartment mildly confused, and her confusion only grows as she sets eyes on Al. Al’s looking rather pale, a little shaken.

“You good?” Alicia asks.

“What? Oh, yeah. Great,” Al replies, too quickly. She’s sitting gingerly on the edge of Alicia’s bed, hands clasped together in her lap.

“My mom said she’s bringing a cot,” Alicia informs. “I can sleep on it,” she continues. “I don’t really care.”

“I do,” Al says. “I’ll sleep on it.”

Alicia shakes her head. “You’re injured. Take the bed.”

Al stops arguing. She slides further back on the bed, leaning her back against the headboard. “So what now?” Al asks.

“Well, if you could walk, I’d give you a tour of the stadium,” Alicia says. “But since you can’t, I guess we’re going to be doing a lot of reading.”

“Or you could tell me what’s going on with the Vultures. That’s what you call those people that are gathered out in the lot, right? What’s their deal?”

Alicia sighs and pulls up her desk chair, dropping into it. “They’re waiting for us to leave or die,” Alicia says.

“I guess that’s why they wouldn’t let me interview them.”

Alicia snorts. “Is that what you were trying to do when you got stabbed?”

Al grins. “Something like that.”

“That’s a pretty stupid reason to get stabbed.”

“That guy just lost his cool,” Al says. She pauses. “My van is out there,” she says. “There’s shit in there that I need.”

“Is this the part where you ask me to retrieve it?” Alicia asks.

Al smiles. “No,” she says. “We’ll go together once I can walk.”

“That’s a terrible idea. The Vultures –”

“What? Are they going to stop us?”

Alicia hesitates. “I don’t know. Do you want to risk that?”

“I have to.”

Alicia doesn’t understand, but she nods. “We’ll see,” she concedes. “But you can barely put weight on your leg.”

“I know.”

Alicia pauses. “Don’t breathe a word of this to my mom. Or anyone, really.”

Al smirks. “I mean, you’re pretty much the only person I talk to around here.”

Alicia smiles, and Madison returns with the cot in that moment. Alicia takes the cot from her mom and sets it up between the bed and the desk, throwing her pillow and blanket on top of it.

“If there’s a problem,” Madison says, holding a walkie out to Alicia, “call.”

“Yes, Mom.”

Madison hugs her, which is only kind of weird, then leaves them alone. Alicia shuts the door behind Madison and locks it.

“So,” Al says, “when do you get to stop watching me every second of every day?”

“When my mom says so,” Alicia grumbles.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Al says. “I don’t mind. I actually sort of like you.”

Alicia laughs. “Thanks,” she says. “You’re not half bad, either.”

Al grins and shakes her head. “You want to hand me a book?”

*

Naomi gives Madison the news at lunch, quietly, so the rest of the community doesn’t hear. Jeff’s paralyzed from the waist down. Madison stops chewing for a moment, nods, then continues acting like everything is normal.

“On our next run, we’ll look for a wheelchair,” Madison says.

“Mom!” Nick calls, interrupting her meeting with Naomi. He jogs over, Luciana trailing not far behind, and Madison looks up, eyebrows raised.

“This better be good news,” Madison says.

“Better,” Nick replies. He comes to a stop beside Madison’s table, smiling. “Our food’s starting to grow again.”

*

Alicia’s first night back in her apartment is rough. Al can kind of stand, but walking is still out of the question, so Alicia has to escort her to the bathroom down the hall. At least when they were in the infirmary, the bathroom was close enough that Al could hobble her way over on her own.

Alicia settles on the cot and immediately regrets forcing Al to take her bed. Sleeping on a cot in the infirmary was one thing, but now that she’s in her home, she’s wildly uncomfortable. The cot’s too hard, and her blanket isn’t warm enough. She rolls from her side onto her back then onto her stomach, but she can’t fall asleep. Al’s quiet, but Alicia can’t tell if she’s awake or not.

Alicia gets up. She figures Al will say something if she’s up, but since she stays quiet, Alicia assumes she’s asleep. Alicia grabs her jacket and slips out of her apartment. She needs some air.

She looks out at the stadium, leaning forward against the railing, and inhales deeply. There’s a light breeze, and Alicia lets her eyes close.

“You’re supposed to be watching Al.”

Alicia jumps, reaching for her butterfly knife, but she realizes she forgot it in the apartment. The stadium is starting to lull her into a false sense of security. Alicia recovers by jamming her hand into her pocket, swallowing hard. She turns to face her mother.

“She’s asleep,” Alicia informs. “And she can’t walk. I’m sure she won’t murder everyone in the community during the ten minutes I’m out here.”

To her surprise, Madison smiles. “I’m just giving you a hard time,” Madison says. She joins Alicia at the railing, staring out at the stadium.

“Why are you up?” Alicia asks.

“Couldn’t sleep,” Madison answers. “Why are you up?”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“If you aren’t sleeping because Al –”

“It’s not that,” Alicia cuts in. “My brain just won’t shut off.”

Madison nods. “Well,” she says, “we’re growing food again.”

“Really?”

Madison hums in confirmation. “Hopefully that means the Vultures will realize they’re wasting their time.”

Alicia doubts it, but she doesn’t say this. She just nods. “And how’s Jeff?”

Madison hesitates a half a second. “He’ll be fine,” she says. “He’ll just have to make some adjustments.”

“Adjustments?”

“His fall paralyzed him.”

“Oh,” Alicia says. She scratches the back of her neck. “We can work on making this place easier to maneuver through, then. Shouldn’t be too hard. We’ve gotten pretty handy.”

Madison grins. She squeezes Alicia’s shoulder and says, “You should go try to sleep. There’s always plenty of work to be done.”

*

Madison’s real concerns begin when Al gets back on her feet. It happens sooner than Madison expects, though Al walks with a heavy limp, so she doesn’t get around too quickly. She still checks in with Naomi every few days, but there’s no sign of infection. The wound is healing nicely, according to Naomi’s report.

Alicia, Strand, and Naomi go on a run early in the morning and return late in the afternoon with a wheelchair for Jeff and a new stash of medical supplies for the infirmary. Mel and Charlie watch their return from folding chairs set out in the parking lot, and Madison stares out at them as she opens the gates for the truck. She can’t help but smile. Madison goes to help unload the truck, spotting Luciana sitting with Al at the lunch tables. They’re laughing about something, and Madison realizes she has no clue where Nick is.

“Hey,” Madison calls to Alicia. “Do you know where Nick is?”

Alicia shrugs. She flips her braid over her shoulder and says, “I’ve been gone half the day, Mom. If anyone should know where he’s at, it’s you.”

“He’s probably with Luciana,” Naomi says from the other side of the truck.

“She’s with Al,” Madison says.

“She said she’d watch Al while I was out,” Alicia explains. “He’s probably off checking on his babies.”

Madison raises her eyebrows. “His babies?”

“You know. The crops.”

“I’m gonna take this to Jeff,” Naomi says, lifting the wheelchair out of the bed of the truck.

“I’ll help Strand –” Alicia begins, but she falls silent when her eyes land on Madison.

“Luciana can help Strand,” Madison says. She jabs her thumb in Luciana and Al’s direction and says, “You can take over for Luciana and keep an eye on Al.”

Alicia rolls her eyes, but she pushes past Madison and does as she’s told.

“Don’t you think you’re taking this a little too far?” Strand questions. “Al hasn’t shown any signs of –”

“We let Charlie in,” Madison interrupts. “We trusted her, and she sold us out to the Vultures. I want eyes on Al until we can be sure she’s not one of them.”

Strand sighs, leaning back against the truck. “You really think she’s with them, Madison?”

Madison pauses. “No,” she admits. “When I met her, she was on her own. But I’m not willing to give up what we’ve built. The Vultures are just the first obstacle. Who knows what’ll come after them?”

“Whatever it is, we’ll handle it,” Strand assures her. “You know that.”

Madison looks back to the dining area, her eyes falling on the back of Alicia’s head. Luciana’s approaching them, but Al is still laughing. Madison watches Al reach across the table and grasp onto Alicia’s wrist.

“You need a hand?” Luciana asks.

“Yes,” Madison says, tearing her eyes away from Alicia and Al. “Can you help Strand unload the truck?”

“Of course.”

“Where are you going?” Strand asks.

“I’ll be right back,” Madison says over her shoulder. She walks briskly over to the table Alicia and Al are seated at, accidentally startling Alicia when she says, “So, Al.”

“Jesus, Mom,” Alicia exclaims, clutching at her chest.

“Sorry,” Madison says, laying a hand on Alicia’s shoulder. Al finally pulls her hand away from Alicia's wrist and turns her eyes up to Madison. “Al,” Madison says. “Once you’re fully healed, you’ll have to start thinking about a job around here, if you’re intending to stay.”

Al gives a strange sort of half-smile and shrugs, making a noncommittal sound. “I mean, I owe you guys for helping me out, at least.”

Madison waves that off with the hand not holding onto Alicia’s shoulder. “Consider it repaying a debt,” Madison says. Alicia gives her a strange look, but Madison ignores it. “But once you’re fully healed, you can choose a job or you’re free to go.”

Al nods. “Got it. Thanks for the heads up.”

Alicia stands, brushing Madison’s hand off of her. “We’ll see you for dinner,” Alicia says, motioning for Al to get up. “Since you wanted Luci’s help instead of mine.”

“Don’t give your mom a hard time,” Al laughs. She nudges Alicia with her elbow, and Alicia pushes her arms away from her.

“We’ll see you at dinner,” Alicia says again. She manages a small smile before they take off. Alicia walks slowly to match Al’s pace, and Madison watches them until they disappear around a corner.

*

Sleeping on a cot for almost a month straight is starting to seriously hurt Alicia’s back and neck. This is made even worse when she helps build the new apartments. Alicia wakes up, groaning at the pain in her back, and forces herself to get off the cot. Al’s asleep in the center of the bed, tangled in the sheets, face pressed into one of the pillows. Alicia grunts, rubbing at her neck in hopes that it’ll help the pain fade quicker. She goes to her dresser and grabs clean clothes. She had to condense her stuff down into the top three drawers so Al could have the bottom two, though most of Al’s stuff is still trapped in her van.

Alicia had the chance to get it for her, but Al refused to hand over the keys. “I’m going with you,” she’d insisted. “As soon as I can walk, we’ll go.”

Alicia doesn’t get why she can’t just grab whatever Al needs and bring it back for her, but she doesn’t argue. Alicia carries her clothes under one arm and jostles Al awake with the other.

“Hey, wake up,” Alicia says. “I have to shower.”

“Then go shower,” Al mumbles. “I won’t go anywhere.”

“My mom will kill me,” Alicia says, though she’s not sure that’s true. If she’s honest, she’s kind of upset Al’s healing so well. They’ve spent a lot of time together in the past month, and as soon as Al’s fully healed, she’ll be out in the community, doing her own thing. She won’t need Alicia around. So Alicia’s going to milk this as long as she can. “Come on,” Alicia insists. “You know I’m not supposed to let you out of my sight.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Al grumbles. “I’ll be up in a minute.”

“Are you supposed to check in with Naomi today?”

“No,” Al says. She rolls onto her back and pushes her hands into her hair, exhaling heavily. “It’s only once a week now.”

“Hurry up,” Alicia urges. “You should shower, too.”

Al smirks and pushes herself up. “With you?”

“Yes,” Alicia says without thinking. When Al’s eyebrows raise, Alicia’s face burns red and she splutters, “I mean, while I’m there. Not – not _with _me, but at the – you know what? Let’s just go.”

Al laughs and gets to her feet. She still limps when she walks, but her leg doesn’t seem to hurt her the way it had before. That’s good. Of course it’s good, but still. For some reason, Alicia isn’t ready to let go of the way things have been. She works slowly when constructing the new apartments, afraid that if they’re finished too quickly that Al will move out and she’ll never get the chance to see her.

It’s crazy.

“I’m messing with you,” Al says, grinning. She playfully punches Alicia in the arm, and Alicia acts like it hurts as Al gets clean clothes for herself.

“How’s your leg?” Alicia asks, even though she knows the answer.

“Better,” Al says. “Barely hurts.”

Alicia nods. She leads the way to the bathroom and claims the shower stall at the far end, against the wall. She showers as fast as she can, but Al seems to be taking her time.

“You know,” Al says as Alicia’s wrapping a towel around her body and stepping out. “I need a haircut. You don’t happen to have a barber here, do you?”

“No,” Alicia says. “Sorry.”

“Damn. So I’m gonna have to do it myself.”

“Seems so,” Alicia says. She finishes brushing her teeth before Al’s done showering.

“I really need to go to my van,” Al says, shutting the water off. “You think we could go tonight?”

Alicia freezes. “You’re sure you feel well enough?”

“Yeah. I feel great.”

“But if something happens –”

“Nothing will happen,” Al assures her.

“Okay,” Alicia agrees. “But we have to go between two and three, when my mom’s not on watch.”

Alicia gets dressed quickly, wincing when her neck tweaks painfully.

“You alright?” Al asks.

“Mind your own business,” Alicia snaps. “You better not be looking.”

“I’m not a perv, Alicia.”

“My back’s just fucked up,” Alicia says. “That’s all.”

“Your back?”

“That cot’s not comfortable,” Alicia says.

“Oh,” Al says. “We can switch.”

Alicia laughs. She finishes buttoning her shirt and turns to Al, already fully dressed. “You can’t handle it,” Alicia snorts. “You’ll be whining after two nights.”

“Is that a challenge?”

*

They have fresh vegetables for lunch. Nick and Luciana are so proud, and Madison can’t help but look over the wall at the Vultures, still camped out. But with each day that passes, they get more and more ragged, less composed. Madison feels bad for Charlie, even if she did help the Vultures infiltrate their home.

“See?” Strand says, shoving a mouthful of turnip into his mouth. He chews pointedly then continues, “Told you we’d make it work.”

Madison smiles, but her eyes flick over to the table across from hers. Alicia sits across from Al, and Alicia waves her fork around as she speaks. Out of all the people Alicia could become friends with, she has to choose the one random stranger Madison nearly killed a year ago.

Madison’s just glad Al’s healing without issue. In about one more month, Madison’s hoping, Al will have a job and maybe even a place of her own in the community. Then maybe Madison will have made up for being willing to kill her.

*

“It’s clear,” Alicia whispers. “Come on.”

Alicia leads the way, mostly because Al isn’t armed, though Alicia’s not sure what a butterfly knife is going to do against the Vultures if they step in. She supposes it’s mostly in case they encounter walkers.

To Alicia’s surprise, they slip out of the gates and past the Vultures without any problems. Al pulls the van’s key from her pocket and unlocks the back, ushering Alicia inside first. Al pulls the doors shut behind them and immediately gets to work. She grabs a duffel bag out of the corner and starts packing it with things. Alicia can barely keep up. Al shoves a few items of clothing, two trench spikes, and an electric razor into the bag before she hurries to unlock a safe Alicia hadn’t noticed before.

Alicia peers out the window, but everything is still.

“What’s that?” Alicia asks.

Al shoves the boxes into the bag then grunts, “Tapes. You know. For the camera.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t worry,” Al says. “I’m almost done.”

“We could just drive the van into the stadium,” Alicia suggests.

Al huffs. “Why didn’t I think of that?” she says mockingly. “One, it would wake your mother. Two, we actually can’t, because it’s out of diesel.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” Al says. She straightens out and slings the bag over her shoulder. “I’m not actually stupid, Alicia.”

“I know.”

Al nods solemnly. “Let’s go back before they realize we’ve left.”

*

“What in the hell do you think you’re doing?” Madison shouts. Alicia flinches, instinctively shifting closer to Al, and Madison’s eyes nearly bug out of her head. “You went _outside the gates _in the _middle of the night _when _the Vultures _are _out there_? What were you _thinking_, Alicia?”

“I told Al we’d get her stuff,” Alicia blurts. “And we did. There were no problems.”

“No problems?” Madison says. “No, Alicia, there is a _big _problem.”

“Look, Madison, it was my fault,” Al says. “I convinced Alicia –”

“No,” Alicia cuts in. “I said we’d do it. She had things she needed out of there, and only she knew where they were. It’s my fault. I should’ve just told you. I’m sorry.”

Madison’s eyes shift between the two of them. She purses her lips, but Alicia wears her guilt openly. And Al knows they’ve screwed up.

“Madison!” Strand calls from his position at the top of the gate. “We’ve got incoming!”

“What?” Madison says.

“The kid,” Strand says. “It looks like the Vultures are packing up, but she’s on her way over.”

“I’ll handle it,” Madison says. She looks back to her daughter and Al. “As for you two…we’ll pick this conversation up in the morning. Go get some rest.”

*

Al dumps her bag on the floor next to Alicia’s desk and crouches down, unzipping it and digging through it. Alicia drops the butterfly knife on the bedside table and collapses onto her bed for the first time in over a month. She exhales, letting her eyes close. Alicia thinks this is probably what sleeping on a cloud would be like. She listens to Al rustling through her belongings and tries not to think about how her mom is going to murder her when the sun rises. She doesn’t know where they went wrong, and she’s too tired to think it over. Her body aches, and her bed is so soft.

Alicia’s eyes pop open, and for a long moment, she doesn’t know where she is. Well, she knows she’s in her room, but she isn’t staring at the side of her desk the way she has been for the past month. She’s staring at the wall, and not from five inches off the ground. And she feels so _comfortable_.

She’s in her bed. Alicia breathes a sigh of relief and rolls onto her back. Or, she tries to, but she’s met with resistance. Her muscles tense, and she looks down at the arm flung across her waist.

“Shit,” Alicia hisses. She grabs Al’s wrist and lifts her arm slowly then scoots out then off the bed. She sets Al’s arm back down on the bed, grimacing. Al doesn’t even wake up, just slides into the empty space Alicia leaves behind. Okay, so Alicia hadn’t meant to actually fall asleep on her bed, but she also hadn’t expected Al to just sleep on the other side. Although clearly she hadn’t stayed there.

And her mom is _totally _going to kill her.

Alicia tucks the butterfly knife into her pocket and only just happens to glance at her desk. She pauses in the doorway and turns back. There are only two things on the desk: Al’s camera and a tape. Alicia looks back at Al to make sure she’s still asleep, but Al must’ve left the tape out for a reason. Alicia gingerly picks it up and reads the label.

_Amina_

Alicia nearly drops it but manages to catch it before it can clatter against the desk. She takes a seat at the desk and pops the tape into the camera, keeping the volume low. Alicia gnaws on her lower lip. Her mom’s face appears on the little screen.

*

“Mom!”

Madison sets her hammer down and turns back. She’s surprised to see Alicia on her own, no Al following after her, but before Madison can ask her what’s going on, Alicia flings herself into her arms.

“Alicia,” Madison says carefully. She hugs Alicia back, momentarily at a loss for words. “Did something happen?” Madison finally asks.

Alicia shakes her head against Madison’s shoulder. She clears her throat then takes a step back. Her eyes are shiny, but Alicia manages a smile. “No,” Alicia whispers. “Nothing happened. I just, um, I’m sorry about sneaking off last night. And I, uh, I don’t think I hug you enough.”

Madison can’t hide her confusion, but she nods. “Okay,” Madison says. “It’s okay, just promise you won’t run off again.”

“I promise.”

Madison smiles. “The Vultures left,” she says. “Except Charlie stayed behind. She chose us.”

Alicia blinks. “You trust her?”

Madison laughs and pats Alicia’s shoulder. “Not at all,” she says. “Nick’s watching her carefully.”

“Good,” Alicia says. She pauses. “I’m in trouble, right? What’s my punishment?”

Madison grins and bends down to pick her hammer back up. “Your punishment? You have to spend all day building new apartments with your mom.”

Confusion flickers across Alicia’s face – she had to do that anyway – but then it dawns on her. Alicia smiles and shakes her head. “That’s a terrible punishment, Mom,” Alicia says.

“I know how horrible it is to spend so much time with me,” Madison teases.

Alicia laughs and waves her off. “You’re not funny,” she says. “I’m gonna go change. I’ll be right down.”

*

“So what’s your punishment?”

Alicia nearly jumps out of her skin and whips around to see Al standing back by the dresser, adjusting the collar of her shirt. “I didn’t get one,” Alicia says. “I have to build apartments all day with my mom, but I was going to do that anyway. I guess she’s letting me off the hook.”

“Lucky you,” Al says with a wide smile. She motions toward the desk. “You watched the tape.”

“I did.”

There’s an awkward pause before Al says, “And?”

Alicia shrugs. “I watched it. We don’t have to talk about it.”

“But there’s something we do have to talk about.”

Alicia swallows hard. “What?”

She waits for Al to say something about how they’d slept in the same bed, but Al just nonchalantly says, “I need to find someone to cut my hair. I got the razor from my van last night.”

Alicia’s shoulders slump a little. “Yeah. I can find you someone,” she promises. “Luci might be able to do it.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah,” Alicia says. “She cut mine once.”

“She didn’t butcher it?”

Alicia laughs. “No! She did a nice job.”

“No offense, but cutting your hair is probably easier than cutting mine.”

“Just tell her what to do,” Alicia says. “In fact, I bet you she’s in the garden with Nick right now. Just go ask her.”

Al’s eyebrows raise. “I’m allowed to leave your side?”

Alicia suppresses the urge to wince and nods. “Yeah. Sure.”

“You don’t sound very convinced.”

Alicia shrugs. “Just do it, okay? You have my permission.”

Al grins. “Oh, I have your _permission_?”

“Get out of here,” Alicia snaps. “I have to change.”

“We can shower together but you can’t change in front of me?” Al jokes.

“We have not showered together!”

“I mean, we were in different stalls, but we both showered in the same overall room, right?”

“Go!”

Al chuckles to herself and tucks the razor into her back pocket. Her limp is less pronounced as she makes her way to the door. Al stops right next to Alicia and waits for Alicia to look up at her. Al winks, smirks, then leaves the apartment in search of Luci.

Alicia’s face flushes, and she changes quickly into her work clothes and tries to push her feelings aside.

*

Nick serves up more fresh vegetables for dinner. Madison sits at her usual table with Strand, Nick, and Luciana, but oddly, Alicia takes a seat on the end beside her. And Al sits across from Alicia. Madison catches Alicia glancing over at her, as if she’s silently asking if it’s okay that they’re joining them, and Madison smiles at Alicia. Alicia seems to relax, and the conversation feels natural, even with Charlie sitting on the other end beside Nick, jabbing at her turnips with her fork.

“I cut Al’s hair,” Luciana announces, reaching over and pushing her fingers through Al’s hair. Madison hadn’t consciously noticed, but Al’s hair is definitely shorter. Not much, but it does look neater than before. “I did a great job, didn’t I?” Luciana laughs. Al dodges her hand, grumbling.

“You should cut mine,” Strand says.

“I’m gonna start charging,” Luciana muses. “You know, using the barter system.”

“I like that look for you, though,” Alicia says, pointing her fork at Strand.

“You should cut Nick’s hair,” Madison pipes up.

“Mom!” Nick says. “No!”

Madison grins and nudges Alicia. “What do you think?”

“Yeah, Nick, I think you’re in need of a haircut,” Alicia snickers.

“I’ll cut it,” Luciana offers, and Nick shoots her a glare. They all laugh, and Luciana adds, “I’m just kidding, baby.”

“Oh,” Madison says. “We’ve almost got the new apartments finished. I’m hoping we’ll be able to spread out a little more. We might even be able to get Charlie and Al rooms of their own soon.”

“Hey,” Cole calls from the adjacent table. “Some of us have been waiting for rooms of our own for a while now!”

“You’ll get yours first,” Madison assures him. “We’ll work it all out.”

Maybe Madison’s not always the most attentive parent, but she notices Alicia’s mood seems to have shifted through the rest of dinner, and she’s one of the first to take off. On her way by, she claps Madison on the shoulder and says, “Don’t forget, you left your hammer in the apartment. Mine’s in the toolbox.”

“Thanks,” Madison says. She catches Alicia’s wrist in her hand before she can walk off. “You good?”

“Yeah,” Alicia says evenly. “Great. I think we’re going to have the first apartment finished by Monday.”

Madison nods. “We’re making good progress.”

*

Alicia sits by herself in one of the middle row of seats overlooking the stadium. She has her feet propped on the seat in front of her, and she absently fidgets with her butterfly knife, staring down at the gardens. Even though the sun set a good half hour ago, Nick’s still among his crops, studying them, checking to make sure they’re still growing. Luci’s with him, mostly just to keep him company, and there’s a painful pang in Alicia’s chest when her mind flicks back to Jake.

Charlie’s there, too, hovering just outside of the gardens. Apparently Madison was serious about having Nick watch over her. Just like Alicia _should _be watching Al, but she can’t bring herself to return to her apartment yet, to share a small space with Al. At least, not yet. Alicia leans back in the seat, breathes in the fresh air, and messes around with her butterfly knife.

“You’re pretty good at that.”

Alicia twists around and watches Al descend the stairs until she reaches Alicia’s row. Alicia nods in acknowledgement, and Al motions to the seat beside her.

“You mind?” Al asks.

“No,” Alicia says.

Al drops into the seat, hogging the armrest. “You know, I think I’d like to be a farmer,” Al comments. “When I have to take a job, you know.”

“You’re staying?” Alicia questions.

Al shrugs. “Yeah, for now. I want to start interviewing everyone, you know? Get a feel for what life is like here before I decide if it’ll be permanent or not.”

Alicia nods. “That’s a good idea.”

“Yeah?”

Alicia hums and dares to look over at Al. “Yeah,” she confirms. She pauses. “Your hair looks nice.”

Al grins. “Now you’re just flattering me.”

“No, really.”

Al shakes her head. “You’re hard to figure out, Alicia.”

Alicia laughs in surprise. “Says you.”

Al smiles. “So you were gone when I got up this morning.”

“I went to see my mom.”

“I just realized maybe I should’ve asked about sharing the bed with you,” Al says. “I tried to sleep on the cot, but you were right. That thing is uncomfortable as hell.”

Alicia busts out laughing. “Told you.” When she gets it together, she adds, “It’s okay. But next time, stay on your side.”

“Next time?”

Alicia hesitates. “I mean, the apartments aren’t finished yet. And I am _not _sleeping on that cot again.”

“Yeah, that was awful,” Al complains. “I don’t know how you did it for so long.”

“It fucked up my back.”

“It fucked up mine, and I was only on it for an hour.”

They grin at each other, and Alicia pockets the butterfly knife, getting to her feet. “We should go,” Alicia says. “Before my mom puts us in the rotation and makes us go on watch at, like, five in the morning.”

“I’d rather die.”

*

Madison unveils the first newly finished apartment on Monday, as Alicia predicted. Alicia’s at her side, a hammer hanging from her belt and an LA Dodgers hat backward on her head. No matter how many times Madison asks her to wear her hat forward, Alicia never does. Madison figures she’s probably doing it to spite her at this point.

“Cole,” Madison announces. “This place is yours.”

“Thank you,” Cole says. Madison bets he’s just eager to get out of Strand’s room; she doubts Strand is the most gracious host in the world.

“I can’t believe we finished that,” Alicia admits.

“But we did,” Madison says, putting an arm around Alicia’s shoulders. “And we’ll finish the others, too.”

“I think I need a break,” Alicia says.

“Take one,” Madison says.

“You sure?”

“Yeah. We have a big enough crew. It won’t set us back too much.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

“But drink some water first,” Madison adds. “You’re looking a little sunburnt. Maybe if you wore your hat correctly –”

Alicia pulls the hat off her head and slaps it back down so the brim faces the front. “I’m going to shower and nap,” Alicia says. “We accomplished so much, and I feel gross.”

“But now you don’t have to go to the gym,” Strand jokes, popping up behind Madison.

Alicia snorts. She _has _been lifting a lot of shit ever since she started doing construction projects around the stadium with Madison. Alicia pulls the hammer from her belt and hands it to Madison. “I’ll see you guys later,” she says.

*

Alicia steps out of the shower feeling refreshed, and she changes into sweats and a baggy T-shirt. She heads to her apartment, not even considering that maybe Al will be in it, but when she throws the door open, she finds Al seated at the desk, hunched over her camera.

“What are you doing here?” Alicia asks.

Al leans back in the desk chair then swivels around. “Just messing with my camera,” she answers. Her eyes graze down Alicia’s body before she asks, “What are _you _doing here?”

“I’m taking a nap,” Alicia says. “I finished constructing an apartment today.”

“Congrats,” Al says with an odd amount of sincerity in her voice. Alicia nods and drops her dirty clothes into the hamper. “I’ll be quiet,” Al promises. “Oh, and I talked to Madison – your mom – about farming.”

“Yeah?” Alicia says. She stretches out on her bed, yawning. “What’d she say?”

“She thinks it’s a good idea.”

“Nick will show you what to do,” Alicia says.

“I think I can start next week,” Al says.

Alicia swallows hard. “That’s good,” she replies. “I’m gonna sleep.”

“Sure.”

Alicia doesn’t sleep. She lies with her back to Al, eyes closed, but she never drifts off. Her heart hammers in her throat, and she focuses on trying to breathe evenly. She can hear Al messing around with the camera, though she stays as quiet as she can. Occasionally, she curses under her breath.

After what feels like hours, Alicia rolls over. “So, I bet you’re eager to get an apartment of your own.”

Al jumps then twists around in the chair. “You’re up,” she says dumbly.

“I am now,” Alicia says. _Well, I never fell asleep, but I guess you didn’t know that_. “So?”

Al shrugs. “I mean, it’s a little cramped in here, but we’ve made it work. I’ll probably be the last person to get a new apartment anyway, right?”

“Yeah.”

Al grins. “Nice try. You can’t get rid of me that easily, sweetheart.”

Alicia rolls her eyes but can’t stop herself from blushing. “Don’t call me sweetheart,” she mutters.

“And if I do?” Al says. “Hmm? What’re you gonna do, _sweetheart_?”

Alicia gets off the bed and crosses the room. Al just has enough time to get to her feet and straighten out her back, accentuating the few inches she’s got on Alicia. Al’s eyebrows raise as Alicia gets in her face, teeth bared.

“I’ll _make _you stop,” Alicia threatens.

“You’ll make me?” Al murmurs. A smile flickers on her face, and only then does Alicia realize how close she’s positioned herself to Al. She’s practically pinning Al back against the desk, but Al seems unbothered. She doesn’t lean away – in fact, she might be leaning closer to Alicia. She’s completely relaxed, not at all worried about Alicia attacking her. Maybe she knows Alicia’s bluffing.

Alicia falters. There are only inches of space between their bodies, their noses almost touching. The butterfly knife is in Alicia’s pocket, but she doesn’t even consider going for it. She could, if she wanted to seem serious.

“Well?” Al prompts. Her voice is low, a rumble in the back of her throat. Her tongue darts out and wets her lips before she says, “What’s it gonna be, sweetheart? You gonna stab me? Or are you just gonna keep standing here, breathing my air?”

Alicia balks. “I’m not gonna stab you.”

“So you’re just gonna stay in my personal space then?”

“Why? Does it bother you?” Alicia questions.

“No,” Al chuckles. “But it seems like it bothers you.”

Alicia really can’t back down now. Her hands clench into fists at her side, every muscle in her body tense. Al smirks, waiting. Alicia’s jaw clenches, and she hits her fist against the side of Al’s thigh. Al grunts, her leg starting to buckle beneath her, but she catches herself back on the desk.

“Don’t be such an asshole,” Alicia snaps. She takes a step back, breathes a little easier as Al pushes herself back upright.

“That was a low blow, Alicia,” Al says.

Alicia pulls the butterfly knife from her pocket and flips it open. “I could’ve stabbed you,” she reminds. She closes the knife and pockets it again. She spins around and returns to the bed, settling with her back to Al once more.

Alicia, of course, can’t sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This side project is a lot longer than I initially anticipated but it is what it is, I guess. I have three other currents WIPs I can't seem to just finish one at a time, but I am doing my best, I promise. I will edit and post the other chapters of this story very soon, since they're already written.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments, and I'll respond as quickly as possible!


	2. Chapter 2

“You sure you don’t want to help build apartments?” Madison teases, jabbing Strand in the stomach with the butt of her hammer.

“Hell no,” he says. “That’s your forte. I’ll stick to runs, thank you very much.”

Madison pauses, eyes scanning the stadium around them. Nick and Luciana showing Charlie the gardens. Cole and a couple of friends hauling his stuff into his new apartment. Naomi seated up in the stands.

“Do you think Alicia’s been acting weird lately?” Madison asks.

Strand makes a noncommittal sound and shrugs. “I think she spends a lot of time with Al, and Al’s pretty weird.”

“I wouldn’t say she’s weird,” Madison says. “She has her priorities screwed up, though.”

Strand smiles. “I don’t know if Alicia’s being weird, Madison. She seems alright to me.”

Madison hums. “Maybe I’m reading too far into it.”

“Probably,” Strand agrees. “She’s getting pretty handy, though. Look at that apartment.”

Madison laughs. “Don’t be fooled. It was mostly me.”

Strand snorts. “Right. I’ll believe that when I see it.”

*

Night falls, and Alicia doesn’t move from the center of her bed. Because it’s _her _bed. Fuck Al. She can take the cot.

Al messes with her camera well after dark. At some point, Alicia falls asleep. When she opens her eyes, it’s still dark, and there’s someone behind her. Alicia doesn’t think, just sends her elbow into the soft mass behind her.

Al groans, rolling away from Alicia. She clutches at her stomach and exclaims, “Dude! What the fuck?”

Alicia scrambles into a sitting position, wearing an expression that is both confused and angry. “What the fuck?” Alicia repeats. “Yeah, what the fuck! What are you doing in my bed?”

“We talked about this,” Al says. “Fuck, man. That hurt!”

“It was supposed to!”

Al sits up, wincing, and meets Alicia’s gaze. “Okay,” Al says. “I’m sorry.”

Alicia exhales heavily. “It’s okay,” she dismisses. “I’m sorry for elbowing you. I just –”

“Panicked?”

“Something like that,” Alicia mutters. Al slides to the end of the bed, and Alicia leans over and snags her wrist. “Where are you going?” Alicia asks.

“I’ll take the cot,” Al says. “It’s fine.”

Alicia hesitates. “You don’t have to go,” she says.

“I don’t have to go?”

Alicia presses her lips together momentarily. “Stay,” she says.

Al swings her legs back up onto the bed. She carefully settles on her side, doesn’t cross into Alicia’s space. Alicia doesn’t fall back to sleep until she hears Al’s breathing even out. When Alicia wakes up in the morning, no one’s touching her. No one’s in her space. But when she rolls onto her back and turns her head, Al’s still on the other side of the bed. She’s still asleep, face pressed into the pillow, one arm dangling off the edge of the bed.

Alicia gets up and goes to her desk, taking a seat. She pushes Al’s camera and tapes to the back and pulls the journal she started out of the drawer. She flips to the next blank page, picks up a pen, but hesitates. Her brain goes blank. She has nothing to say. Nothing, but something’s bursting to be written down.

She stares at the blank page for so long that she doesn’t even hear Al get up until she leans in next to Alicia.

“What’re you doing?” Al asks.

“Jesus!” Alicia says. Al’s face is way too close to hers, and Alicia’s breath hitches in her throat. “Nothing,” Alicia says, snapping the journal shut.

“Were you gonna write something?”

“No,” Alicia says. “Back up.”

Al takes a step back, and Alicia breathes easier. “I’m sorry,” Al says. “If I interrupted –”

“It’s fine,” Alicia interrupts. “I’ve been staring at that page for a long time.”

“And?”

Alicia stands and faces Al before shrugging. “And I never know what to say.”

“That’s okay.”

Alicia shakes her head. “It’s a pain in the ass,” she says. She throws the journal back into the desk drawer. “I’m gonna shower,” she says. “Maybe you should see Nick about farming, you know? Get a head start.”

Al nods. Her eyes study Alicia’s face until Alicia turns away. On her walk to the bathroom, she thinks about Jake, about his appreciation for literature and poetry, even in a world where none of that stuff should have any meaning.

When she returns to the room, Al’s sitting at her desk, and Alicia wordlessly walks up and snatches the journal out of the drawer. Droplets of water from her hair splash against the cover of the journal, and Alicia wipes them away with her sleeve and grabs the pen off the desk. She takes a seat on her bed, cross-legged, and flips to the next blank page.

_Jake didn’t get it_.

She writes that one sentence across the top line in shaky, crooked handwriting. She doesn’t recognize it as her own, but then again, it’s been a long time since she wrote anything down.

Alicia caps the pen, shuts the journal, and sets them on the bedside table.

“When are you going to start your interviews?” Alicia asks abruptly.

Al spins around in the desk chair and plants her hands on her knees. “Soon,” she says. “I have to figure out what I’m trying to do first.”

“What do you mean?”

Al smiles. “I mean, there’s a whole community here. There’s a whole story about how it was built, why it was built. There’s all these individual stories that converge here. I have to figure out how I want to structure this, where I want to start.”

“Who do you start with?” Alicia asks.

Al’s smile widens. “Madison, of course.”

*

“Where is she?” Madison asks, grabbing Strand by the bicep.

“Where’s who?” he questions.

“Charlie,” Madison growls. 

“With your son, I’d assume,” Strand answers. “Why?”

Madison stops walking and releases Strand’s arm to point toward the gates. “Guess who’s out there?”

Strand’s eyebrows raise. “The Vultures?”

Madison shakes her head. “Just two. Mel and Ennis.”

Strand’s expression darkens. “Okay. We need to find the kid.”

*

The walkie on the bedside table crackles, and Alicia startles.

“Alicia,” Madison says. “I need you to meet us at the gate. Now.”

“I’m on it,” Alicia replies.

“What do you think that’s about?” Al asks.

“It’s nothing good,” Alicia says grimly. She takes the butterfly knife then goes to the dresser. She digs through her clothes until she pulls out the fully loaded Glock. She checks the magazine, just to be sure, then jams it into her waistband. “Sounds like you’re supposed to stay here.”

Al snorts. “Yeah, right. Not gonna happen.”

Al loads a fresh tape into the camera and follows Alicia out of the apartment.

*

Alicia arrives with Al in tow, camera in hand. Madison expects no less. Madison spots the Glock at Alicia’s hip, and though she wishes Alicia would use a proper holster instead of shoving it into her waistband, Madison’s glad she had the foresight to bring it.

“What happened?” Alicia asks. Madison’s eyes lock with Alicia’s, but Alicia quickly looks away to Nick, Luciana, Strand, Naomi, and Cole before her eyes return to Madison’s face.

“Mel and Ennis are out there,” Madison informs. “We don’t know why –”

“And the kid can’t tell us,” Strand pipes up, motioning to Charlie, who’s hiding behind Nick.

“But we’re going to find out,” Madison says. “Cole, Naomi, man the gates. Nick, stay here with Charlie. Alicia, Strand, and Luciana, come with me.”

Madison watches Alicia put her hand against Al’s stomach to stop her from advancing. “You should stay here,” Alicia says.

“No way,” Al replies.

“You were stabbed once,” Alicia says. “Stay here.”

“I’m not staying.”

“She can come,” Madison cuts in. “Just stay behind us.”

Al nods. Madison knows she’s being filmed, but she can’t bring herself to object to it. Madison motions for Cole to open the gates, and he does without question. Madison leads the way, flanked by Strand and Luciana, with Alicia not far behind her, walking in stride with Al.

“I guess Ennis didn’t quite hit you anywhere fatal,” Mel calls. Al sets the camera on him, and Madison’s glad Al doesn’t let him bait her.

“Mel,” Madison says. She stops with about a yard of pavement separating them. “What brings you here?”

Mel holds his arms out, smiling thinly. “As if you don’t know.”

“I’m afraid I don’t,” Madison replies. “So if you could just tell me, we can get on with this.”

Mel nods and rubs his chin with his hand. “You have my kid,” he says. “We’ve come to get her back. No guns, no backup. Just me and Ennis. We want Charlie.”

Madison pauses. “She chose us,” Madison says. “She wants to stay.”

“Bring her here,” Mel says. “I just want to talk.”

Madison glances back at the stadium, spots Cole on top of the gate with a rifle aimed at the two brothers. “We aren’t going to do that,” Madison says. “I think you should go.”

Mel shakes his head. “Not without my kid.”

“She’s not your kid,” Strand says. “She’s _a _kid. She isn’t yours. And I think she left for a reason.”

Mel points a finger at him. “You all will regret this. If you’re smart, you’ll bring her out here.”

“She stays,” Madison insists. “Be on your way, Mel. Don’t make me use force.”

Ennis grabs him by the arm and tugs him along. “Come on,” Ennis grunts.

“You’ll regret this!” Mel shouts over his shoulder. “I will make you regret this!”

*

Alicia lies awake that night, staring up at the ceiling. Al’s asleep to her left, hogging most of the covers. Alicia can’t stop thinking about what Mel said, about what it might mean. She’d talked it over with her mom and Strand for hours, but frankly, he could’ve meant anything. Maybe he was even lying. Alicia doubts it, but it’s possible. Maybe he’s gone forever. But maybe he’s just biding his time.

Alicia shakes Al’s arm until she stirs and rolls onto her back. “S’up?” Al mumbles.

“Can’t sleep,” Alicia replies. “I keep thinking about what Mel said.”

“What did Mel say?”

“That he’d make us regret not giving him Charlie.”

“Don’t even waste your time worrying about that twit,” Al yawns. “He’s all talk.”

“But what if he’s not?”

“Your mom’s smart,” Al says. “She’ll know what to do if he tries something.”

“But –” _But what if my mom gets hurt? What will I do without her?_

“But what?” Al asks. She turns her head toward Alicia, but Alicia keeps staring up at the ceiling, chewing on her lower lip.

“Nothing,” Alicia mutters.

“No,” Al says. “Tell me.”

Alicia hesitates. “What if something happens to her?” she asks quietly. “What if something happens to my mom because of Mel?”

Al inhales deeply. “Then we’ll make him pay,” she answers. “But I highly doubt anything will happen to your mom.”

“How would you know?”

Al laughs. She flicks Alicia’s arm to get her to look at her and grins when their eyes lock. “She managed to steal my van from me,” Al says. “I mean, I got it back right away, but still. She knows how to handle herself. Mel doesn’t stand a chance.”

Alicia smiles, but it doesn’t match her eyes. “I don’t know, Al,” Alicia says. “She’s as human as the rest of us. She messes up sometimes.”

“Yeah,” Al agrees. “But she also built this place from the ground up. Made it a home. I know she won’t go down without a fight, and I’d bet anything that Madison would win any fight that comes her way.”

“Now you’re being overdramatic.”

“No, seriously,” Al says. “I really admire Madison. I’m glad I got to see what she’s done here. When we first met, this place was just an idea. Or a dream. But she made it real.”

There’s a brief pause before Alicia says, so quiet she can barely hear herself, “Would you really leave? If you got all your interviews done and life around here got boring. Would you leave?”

Al exhales heavily and thinks for a moment. Alicia studies Al’s face carefully and struggles to keep her expression blank, just in case Al’s answer is _yeah, I’d go_. She doesn’t want to look _too _hurt.

“I don’t know,” Al admits. “I mean, if I’m honest, living all alone in my van isn’t…the greatest thing in the world. It’s not terrible, but it’s kind of nice to have regular showers and frequent interactions with other human beings. In the van, all that stuff’s kinda hit or miss.”

“It sounds like it’s easy to get lonely,” Alicia says carefully.

Al smiles wryly. “You don’t know the half of it.”

Alicia hums in agreement and takes the chance to steal some of the covers back from Al. “I bet you’ve come across other settlements before,” Alicia finally says.

“Yeah,” Al says. “But Alicia?”

“Hmm?”

“Be honest. Do you want me to stay?”

Alicia laughs, but it dies off quickly. “You’re alright,” she teases. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind if you did.”

“Just say you want me to stay and I will.”

Alicia rolls her eyes and rolls so she faces the wall instead of Al. “Goodnight, Al,” she says.

“Now you’re just being stubborn.”

“You already know what I want,” Alicia says. “Why make me say it?”

“I want to hear it.”

“Well, too bad. I let you have the other side of my bed, and I let you hog all the covers instead of making you sleep on that godawful cot. Isn’t that good enough?”

“No.”

Alicia rolls back to face Al, because apparently, their conversation isn’t over. Al’s got her head propped up against her fist, and despite it being almost three in the morning, Al seems very awake. Al smirks.

“Come on,” she says. “Just say you want me to stay.”

“Why?” Alicia questions. “I mean, you seem okay, but if you think about it, we barely know each other.”

Al’s eyebrows raise. “Oh, really? You share a bed with someone you barely know?”

“I mean, yeah.”

Al snorts. “Right. We barely know each other. Okay, Alicia. How about this. I know you absolutely hate turnips, but you force yourself to eat them because Nick grows them, and he’s so proud of his crops, so you suffer through it. I know you spend all day doing backbreaking work building new apartments so the other people in this community will eventually have spaces of their own, and after those long days, you come back here and stay up until I’m ready to go to bed even though you’re exhausted. I know you just pretend it bothers you when I joke about us showering together, but your face still gets really red because I’m sure you’re picturing it –”

“Okay, that one is not true!”

Al laughs. “Okay, fine, that one was a stretch. But how about this. I know you’re happy for Luci and Nick, but if they act too coupley for too long, you can’t handle it and you always leave.”

“What?”

“You haven’t noticed?” Al questions.

“I don’t do that.”

“You do,” Al insists. “The other night at dinner, Nick put his arm around Luci, and she kissed him on the cheek, and they got all whispery and giggly, and you bolted. I watched you shovel the rest of your food into your mouth before you ran for the hills.”

An indignant look passes Alicia’s face, but she realizes she can’t deny it. She _did _do that. “One time,” Alicia says weakly.

“No,” Al says. “Nick showed us around the gardens, and when he started holding Luci’s hand, it’s like your whole mood changed. You got very…sulky.”

“I did not get sulky.”

“You did. Then you rushed the rest of the tour and got us out of there. And I spent all afternoon trying to figure out what set it off, and it dawned on me that it must all be connected to Nick and Luci’s behavior. And not just Nick and Luci, but any couple, really.”

“Bullshit.”

“Is it?”

Alicia grunts. “You know, I’m regretting waking you up.”

“But seriously,” Al says. “Am I wrong? Or does it bother you?”

Alicia sighs. “I mean…I guess it does,” she says. “They just – they don’t _get _it.”

“Don’t get what?”

“What it’s like to lose the one person you thought you needed to keep yourself going.”

Al’s eyebrows pull together, but she doesn’t say anything yet. She waits for Alicia to elaborate, her eyes searching Alicia’s face.

“You know that stupid journal I have?” Alicia says. “You know how I stared at a fucking blank page for, like, ever? I don’t know what to say anymore, because the boy that convinced me that art and literature and poetry and all that shit still matters _died_. He died when our last settlement fell, and I wasn’t even there. I was off mercy-killing people and almost dying myself. So how could he tell me that art matters when no one sticks around long enough to appreciate – or create– art anymore? How could I keep believing that when he became just one more person that died at the hands of the dead? Reading classic literature couldn’t save him. Writing poetry couldn’t, either. But he was so convinced that all of that matters, so I try to write, but nothing comes out –”

Alicia’s voice breaks, but when Al reaches over for her, Alicia knocks her hand away.

“Don’t touch me,” she whispers.

“Alicia –”

“_Don’t_.”

Al concedes, but she lays her hand in the space between them, close enough for Alicia to reach but not so close that it intrudes on her personal space.

“So I’m sorry if seeing Luci and Nick happy makes me – I don’t know. It’s not that I’m unhappy, but I – they just don’t get it. At least they have each other still. They worry about the crops not growing and the Vultures hanging out in the parking lot and spies, and – and not finding enough supplies on each run, but none of that matters. At least they’re both still here. They’re still alive. You can find more supplies somewhere else, but there’s only one _Luci _or there’s only one _Nick _or you get the idea, right?”

“Yes.”

“I’m rambling,” Alicia says. She presses her hands over her face. “It’s stupid.”

“It’s not.”

“You get it.”

“I get it.”

Alicia exhales heavily and blinks the stinging out of her eyes. “We should go to sleep,” she says. “I work in the morning.”

“I’m sure Madison would be okay with giving you the day off.”

“I don’t want the day off,” Alicia says. “I just want to finish the goddamn apartments so we can move on to the next thing.”

“You think if you keep yourself busy, it’ll help you forget.”

“I think if I keep myself busy that at least I’m being productive and doing something worthwhile besides moping and feeling bad for myself.”

Alicia turns her back to Al then pulls the sheets up to her neck. She closes her eyes, even though she doubts she’ll get any sleep now. She listens to the sheets rustle as Al rolls onto her back.

“What was his name?” Al asks.

Alicia hesitates. “Jake,” she says.

“It sounds like he was a smart guy.”

“He was, but he was too idealistic. He wasn’t built to survive this world. And he didn’t.”

“If I’ve learned anything,” Al says, “not just because the dead started walking, but after years spent in warzones and in the absolute worst places on this earth, I’ve learned that sometimes, people just die. No matter how well-equipped they are to survive, sometimes they just die. And there’s nothing we can do to save them. And others – sometimes the people you think _should _die, don’t. The people who deserve to die live, and the people who deserve to live die. Frankly, if you ask me, it’s all about luck.”

Alicia snorts. “Yeah, but sometimes, staying alive is the unlucky thing.”

“Yeah.”

Alicia rolls onto her back once more, because Al won’t just shut up and let her pretend to be asleep. They lie side-by-side, both staring up at the ceiling through the darkness.

“You ever think,” Alicia says, “that if you’d just _been there_, you could’ve stopped something bad from happening? If I’d been with Jake instead of trapped underground, maybe things would’ve gone differently. You know?”

“I know,” Al says. “But you can’t change the past. All you can do is look forward and hope shit gets better tomorrow.”

“That’s the thing though, isn’t it?” Alicia says quietly. “It’ll never get better.”

“It probably won’t,” Al agrees. “But it can always get worse.”

“That was very inspiring, Al. Thank you,” Alicia says wryly.

“Anytime,” Al replies.

“We aren’t going to sleep tonight, are we?”

“Probably not. You could tell me more about Jake.”

“You sure you don’t want to get your camera?”

Al pauses. “No,” she says. “If you want to film something about him, we can do it during the day.”

“You just don’t want to get up to get it,” Alicia says.

“Don’t call me out like that.”

Alicia laughs tiredly. “I don’t want to film anything about him,” she says. “Honestly, I think I’d rather forget.”

“But you can’t.”

“Of course not. You only forget the shit you want to remember. Everything else sticks.”

“I think that’s only partly true.”

“Whatever,” Alicia grumbles. “It’s three in the morning. Cut me some slack.”

“Actually, it’s almost four.”

Alicia groans. “You wanna take my place and build apartments in the morning?”

“Hell no,” Al says. “I already told you. I want to be a farmer.”

“You look like you could build some shit, though, right?” Alicia says.

“Oh, just because I’m a lesbian, I’m good with tools, right?”

“What?” Alicia exclaims. “Did I just accidentally stereotype you?”

“Please,” Al says. “Like you didn’t know.”

“I mean…I didn’t? It’s not like you told me.”

“Because it’s obvious.”

“Well…yeah?”

Al waves her hand in dismissal. “Whatever. If you ever thought for one second that I was straight, just know I am greatly offended. But for the record, I am _not _good at building shit. I’m good at fixing shit. There’s a difference.”

“If I can build an apartment, you can, too. You just aren’t willing to try.”

“You know, I think my leg’s starting to act up again,” Al says.

“Shut up!” Alicia laughs.

Al grins crookedly. “I’m going to start limping hardcore again.”

“Naomi will call you out on your bullshit.”

“Naomi won’t know.”

*

Madison checks in with Naomi first thing in the morning. Jeff’s doing well, but Al’s doing even better. The wound’s nearly completely healed, leaving behind nothing but a faint scar. Al’s still limping a bit, but Naomi thinks that might be more psychosomatic than anything.

Alicia yawns every couple minutes while they construct the next apartment together. She looks as though she’s barely slept and drinks two mugs of coffee within the first hour. It’s well after noon before Al comes around with her camera and gets some footage of Madison and Alicia hammering shit together.

“So Al’s gonna be a farmer,” Alicia says, setting her hammer down.

“Yes,” Madison confirms. “Why?”

“Don’t you think we could use another hand with these apartments?” Alicia asks. “We’d make even more progress.”

“Alicia,” Al warns.

“If Al wants to farm, she can farm,” Madison says. “But if you’d rather build apartments with us, Al, we’d love to have you. Alicia’s right. We’d make more progress.”

Madison doesn’t know what’s passing between Alicia and Al, but Al’s glaring at Alicia, and Alicia’s got this smug look on her face.

“I already told Alicia,” Al says. “I’m no good at building things.”

“We can show you,” Alicia says. “I mean, we had to learn it. It’s not so bad once you get the hang of it.”

“I really think I’d rather farm,” Al says. “But thanks for the offer.”

Alicia shrugs and picks the hammer back up. “Oh, hey! Al! Do me a favor? Bring me another cup of coffee?”

Al takes Alicia’s mug and heads off, and Madison turns to Alicia inquisitively. “So,” Madison says as Alicia uses more force than necessary to hammer a nail into the wall. “What was that about?”

“What was what about?” Alicia asks.

“You and Al.”

“What about it?” Alicia questions.

“She’s getting you coffee.”

“So?” Alicia says. “We’re friends.”

“Friends?”

“Friends,” Alicia insists. “God, Mom, why are you prying all of the sudden?”

“I’m not prying,” Madison says defensively. “I’m just curious about my daughter’s life.”

Alicia laughs. “Since when?”

“Since you became friends with a woman I nearly killed.”

Alicia chokes on air and nearly drops her hammer. “_What_? You almost _killed _Al?”

Madison sighs and grabs her bottle of water, shaking her head. “I was desperate,” she admits. “It was when I was separated from you, Nick, Luciana, and Strand. I was doing everything in my power to find you, and I came across Al and her van and…I knew if I had that van, I’d be able to find you so much quicker. So I stole it, but she came after me and…I’m not proud of it, but I thought I was doing what I had to do.”

“Then she showed up here,” Alicia says. “And the Vultures injured her. You took her in because you felt like you owed her.”

“I do owe her,” Madison says. “Because of her, I found you. I was led to this place; I had a reason to build it, and I finally knew for sure this is what I wanted – needed. This is what we needed. I just – I didn’t expect you two to become friends.”

Alicia shakes her head. “Is that such a bad thing, Mom? Ever since Jake died…I mean, I haven’t really had anyone.”

“You have me,” Madison says immediately. “And Nick. Luciana. Strand.”

“No offense,” Alicia says. “But you’re my mom. Strand is more your best friend than mine. And Nick and Luci have each other. I just – I need friends of my own, right?”

Madison smiles. “Yeah,” she agrees. “I can see why being friends with your mom isn’t the most attractive idea ever.”

Alicia cracks a smile. “Don’t worry. I won’t do anything stupid. Like try to kill her.”

“That’s not funny.”

Alicia laughs as Al walks back up with a full cup of coffee in hand. “Here,” Al says, handing Alicia the cup. “It’s decaf.”

“It better not be,” Alicia says.

Al grins. “It’s not. But be careful. Shit’s hot. I burned my tongue.”

“You drank out of my cup?”

“Yeah,” Al says, shrugging. “Why not? That’s good coffee.”

Alicia rolls her eyes but takes a careful sip. Madison puts her hammer down and tells Alicia, “I’ll be right back, okay?”

“Okay, but I’m taking a break while you’re gone,” Alicia says.

Madison nods and motions for Al to follow after her. She’s glad she doesn’t have to tell Al to put the camera away; it’s already off. Al follows without question, brushing her hair back from her face. Madison walks until she’s positive she’s out of earshot of anyone, but especially Alicia.

“What’s up?” Al says.

“Remember how I threatened you?” Madison says.

“Over hurting Alicia? Yeah. How could I forget?”

“I’m sorry,” Madison says. “I shouldn’t have – look, I misjudged you not once, but twice. Threatening you was a mistake, the same way stealing your van was a mistake. I trust that you won’t do anything to hurt her. Physically.”

Al’s eyebrows pull together. “Right,” Al says slowly. “I feel like there’s a _but _in there somewhere.”

“But,” Madison says, flashing a quick but humorless smile. “Alicia obviously trusts you and considers you to be a friend.”

“Right,” Al says.

“And it was wrong of me to threaten you,” Madison repeats. “I know that, so I won’t threaten you this time. I’ll ask you, please, _please_, don’t hurt her. She’s already – look, I don’t know what you know, and I don’t want to know. That’s between you and Alicia. And I like you, Al. I really do. But I don’t want to see you hurt Alicia.”

“Because that’ll make you not like me, right?”

Madison inhales deeply. “No,” she says. “That isn’t true. But it’ll show me that you aren’t the person I think you are.”

“You have nothing to worry about,” Al assures her. She smiles broadly. “I don’t go around crushing people’s feelings or, you know, causing them bodily harm for no good reason, Madison. I like what you’ve built here, and I’m grateful to you for taking me in and helping me out. I don’t want to ruin this, for myself or for you or for anyone.”

Madison nods. “I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

Al pauses. “Alicia’s smart. She knows how to handle herself. You did a good job with her.”

Madison shakes her head. “It wasn’t me,” she admits. “I can’t take credit for that. It’s all her.”

Al looks a little confused, but she nods nonetheless. “Really,” Al says. “Don’t worry.”

“There’s always something to worry about,” Madison replies. “I’m just glad I can stop worrying about you. You know, if you don’t want to build apartments, you don’t have to. But I think Alicia wants you to.”

Al laughs. “Of course she does! If I’m there, that means there’s less work for her to do.”

Madison smiles. “While that’s true, I don’t think that’s the only reason why.”

“You should’ve heard her last night.”

“She can complain all she wants,” Madison says. “She’s a shit farmer, though, so she’s stuck with me. But I think – and I could be wrong, but I _am _her mother, so sometimes I get it right – I think she wants you around. She doesn’t have many friends here. She has Luciana, but she’s always with Nick. And there’s Strand, but she sees him as my friend more than hers. You’re the first person she’s really taken to since we started this community.”

Al nods. “I wasn’t lying,” she says. “I’m not good at building things. I fix things.”

Madison’s eyebrows raise. “Like what kinds of things?”

Al shrugs. “Cars, mostly. I tried being a mechanic for a while.”

“You tried?”

Al grins. “I got bored. But my dad used to fix up cars all the time. Taught me some things.”

“You’re really set on being a farmer?”

“Kind of.”

Madison smiles.

*

“Tell me what she said again,” Alicia says.

Al sighs. “Alicia, I’m under a truck.”

“Just tell me again.”

Al rolls out from under the pickup. There’s a grease smear across her cheek, and there’s grease staining the front of her tank top. Her hair’s contained by a Houston Astros ball cap she pulled backward over it, and Alicia can’t help but stare at the muscles rippling up Al’s arms.

“Listen closely,” Al says, “so I don’t have to say this again. Madison said _since you know a thing or two about fixing cars, why don’t you show Alicia some tricks? Just in case there’s an emergency_.”

“What kind of emergency would there be?” Alicia exclaims, throwing her hands up. “Besides, we have you! What do I need to know this for?”

“I don’t know, man,” Al replies. “Ask your mother.”

“I think she just wants some peace and quiet,” Alicia grumbles.

“Well, you’ve had four cups of coffee, and it’s made you really fidgety. I’d want to get rid of you, too, if I were her.” Al rolls back under the pickup. “Just be happy I’m not actually making you learn anything.”

“Yet,” Alicia mutters.

“Yet,” Al agrees.

Alicia takes a seat near the truck, crossing her legs. She taps her fingers incessantly against her knees. “You think you can get this thing to start?” Alicia asks.

“Maybe,” Al says. “I don’t know yet. I told Madison that I’d try.”

“How do you know this stuff?”

“My dad taught me,” Al says. “He owed his own shop.”

“Really?”

“In Houston,” Al confirms.

“But you’re a journalist.”

“I told your mom: I got bored being a mechanic. So I went to school and got out.”

Alicia huffs. “That’s what I was trying to do.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. The dead kind of ruined my plans.”

“Yeah? They ruined mine, too.”

Alicia leans her shoulder against the truck. “What kind of plans?” she asks.

“The kind that involved having a normal life.”

Alicia laughs. “Like your life was ever normal.”

“You got me there,” Al admits. “But I was ready to give up the warzones and shit and, like, make a documentary here in the States.”

“I guess you never got around to it.”

“Well,” Al says. “I’m kind of doing it now, I guess. It’s just taking a long time.”

“What if you die before you finish it?”

Al laughs and rolls back out from under the car. She sits up, grinning. “That was really morbid, Alicia.”

“I mean, it could happen.”

“Yeah,” Al says. “Then oh well. I die before I finish it. What will I care? I’ll be dead.”

Alicia frowns. “That’s not the answer I expected from you.”

Al gulps down half a water bottle and shrugs. “Sorry?”

Alicia shakes her head. She grabs Al’s toolbox and snatches a handkerchief out of it. “Come here,” Alicia says. “You have grease on your face.”

“And on my shirt and on my hands,” Al adds. “So what? It’ll wash off.”

“It’s bothering me. Come here.”

Al slides over and turns her head so Alicia can wipe the grease smear off her cheek. Alicia’s oddly gentle about it and even holds the handkerchief out so Al can wipe her hands off, too.

“Better?” Al asks.

“Yeah. But you have shit taste in baseball teams.”

Al pulls the Astros hat off her head and smacks Alicia with it. “Don’t insult my team,” Al says.

Alicia snorts. “Most of those guys are probably dead by now.”

“Yeah? And what? You think the entire Dodgers team is alive?” Al jokes. She pulls her hat back on. “Now I am actually going to make you learn something. Come on.”

*

“You really think Alicia’s going to learn anything?” Strand asks.

“No,” Madison says. “But I think she’s had a lot of coffee and should put that energy into something other than banging nails into things.”

Strand grins. “You’re just getting rid of her for the day.”

Madison shrugs. “I think she’d rather be with Al, anyway.”

“Don’t say that,” Strand says. “I think she actually likes building apartments with you.”

“It keeps her busy,” Madison replies. “I think that’s the most important thing about it to her. Well, she’s got Al to show her a few things about cars. That’ll keep her busy, keep her mind occupied just as well as hitting a hundred nails will.”

Strand shakes his head. “Look at her. She’s actually bouncing.”

“Too much coffee,” Madison says. “I knew I should’ve cut her off.”

“She looks happy,” Strand comments. “That’s something new.”

*

Alicia’s still giddy by the time she returns to her apartment with Al.

“You need to shower before we go to dinner,” Alicia tells Al, jabbing her in the stomach with her index finger. Al swats her hand away. “You’re gross.”

“_You’re _gross,” Al retorts.

“Not as gross as you,” Alicia says.

Al shrugs and pulls her hat from her head, tossing it onto Alicia’s desk. She runs her grease-stained fingers through her sweat dampened hair then mutters, “Maybe you’re right about needing a shower.”

“I know I’m right,” Alicia says. “Come on. Hurry up. I’ll wait for you.”

*

Alicia and Al arrive ten minutes late to dinner, Madison notices. They’re both grinning as they approach Madison’s table, shoving at each other. Al’s hair is wet, slicked back from her forehead. She’s got a button down shirt with little dogs scattered all over it, laying open over a black shirt.

Luciana chokes on her water when Al sits beside her. “What is _that_?” she exclaims.

“What?” Al laughs. “What’s what?”

“Your _shirt_!”

“What’s wrong with my shirt?” Al questions.

“Is that a Corgi?” Luciana asks, poking her finger against Al’s sleeve.

Al knocks her hand away, grinning. “Leave my shirt alone,” she says. “I haven’t done laundry recently, okay?”

“I think it’s cute,” Madison says.

Strand snorts, but Al tips her head forward and says, “Thank you.”

Madison smiles, eats a turnip, then points her fork at Alicia. “So,” Madison says. “What’d you learn today?”

Alicia’s eyebrows raise. “What did I learn?” she says dumbly.

“Yeah,” Madison says. “You know. From Al.”

Alicia fights off a smile and stares down at her plate. “I learned that maybe I shouldn’t drink so much coffee,” Alicia jokes.

“She learned nothing,” Al says. “Because she doesn’t pay attention.”

“That’s not true,” Alicia argues, but the entire table laughs.

“Too much coffee, huh?” Nick says.

“Yes,” Alicia says. “It’s hard to concentrate when you have to pee every ten minutes.”

“Maybe you should go back to building apartments,” Al says. “At least you’re good at that.”

“Hey!”

The entire table laughs again, and Madison can’t help but think that this is what she’s been looking for.

*

Alicia and Al are the last two people left at the table as Alicia chokes down her last turnips.

“You don’t have to wait,” Alicia tells her. She swallows hard, makes a face.

“I’ll wait,” Al replies. “I was hoping you’d go with me to the van.”

“The van?”

“Yeah,” Al says. “There are a few things I want to grab.”

Alicia doesn’t point out how Al can walk perfectly fine now, which means she’s perfectly capable of defending herself. Alicia touches the butterfly knife in her pocket and nods. “Sure,” Alicia says. “I’ll go with you.”

“Hurry up and finish your turnips,” Al says, patting her hand against the table. She reaches over and snatches one of the remaining turnips off Alicia’s plate and eats it herself. Alicia, frankly, doesn’t mind.

“You’re armed, right?” Alicia asks.

“Shit! I knew I forgot something,” Al says. She flashes Alicia a grin. “You can protect both of us for ten minutes, right?”

Alicia rolls her eyes. “Yeah,” she says. She pushes her plate toward Al. “Finish those for me.”

Al crams the remaining turnips into her mouth and chews pointedly before she stands. She waves Alicia along.

“You cleared this with my mom, right?” Alicia questions.

Al swallows before saying, “Yeah, I talked to her earlier.”

“You told her I was going?”

“I don’t think she’ll mind.”

Al waves at Cole at the gate, and he lets them out without question. Alicia pushes her way ahead of Al, pulling the butterfly knife from her pocket. There’s no reason to use it, but she fiddles with it absently, scanning the surrounding area for any sign of walkers. Cole is vigilant when he’s on watch, though, and anything that could be a threat has already been eliminated.

Al unlocks the van and holds her arm out for Alicia to go in first. She felt rushed the last time she was in the van with Al, but now, Alicia takes a seat in the back and studies the inside of the van. She hates to think it, but it’s kind of like how she’d imagine an apocalyptic bachelor pad. Al has no problem navigating through her shit, though, and she finds everything she needs within a reasonable amount of time.

Al sheds the dog shirt, and Alicia’s eyebrows raise. Her voice dies in her throat. Al, thankfully, does not remove the shirt she has underneath it. Al gathers up an armful of clean shirts, muttering something about never wearing the dog shirt again.

“You needed to come in here for clothes?” Alicia asks.

“No,” Al says. “But since I’m here, I figured I might as well pick some up.” Al stands and drops the shirts into Alicia’s lap. “Hold those for me, will you?”

“You didn’t really give me a choice.”

Al grins. “Exactly.”

Alicia watches as Al climbs into the front and starts digging through something she can’t see. Alicia waits patiently until Al returns to ask, “So, what’d you need?”

Al opens her hand, and a necklace dangles off the end of her finger. It’s handmade, something personal, with a charm on the end. Alicia doesn’t get a good look at what the charm is before Al puts the necklace around her neck and hides it beneath her shirt.

“We’re good to go,” Al says. Alicia stands and holds the bundle of shirts out to Al. “What?” Al says.

“Take your clothes,” Alicia says. “I have to defend us.”

Al snorts. “From what?”

Alicia glares. “Just take your clothes, Al.”

Al laughs but takes the clothes from Alicia. But then she dumps them on the seats behind her and blocks Alicia’s exit, hands on her hips. Before Alicia can ask what she wants, Al questions, “Do you do anything fun?”

“What?” Alicia says.

“Do you do anything fun?” Al repeats. “I mean, do you do _anything _besides sleep, eat, shower, build apartments, and face off with the Vultures? And really, the Vultures are gone now, so –”

“I get it,” Alicia interrupts. “I think you just about summed up my entire life for the past year or so.”

Al nods solemnly. “Come on,” she says. “I have an idea.”

*

“Madison!”

Madison turns her back to the gates and sets her eyes on Al, jogging over from the dining area. Madison smiles and calls, “So you can run now?”

“Apparently,” Al answers, coming to a stop in front of Madison. She puts her hands on her hips and says, “I need your help.”

Madison’s eyebrows raise. “You do?”

“Yeah. It’s for Alicia.”

Madison can’t keep herself from looking suspicious, but she nods. “What do you need?”

Al smirks. “I mean, this is a baseball stadium, right?”

*

The apartment door bangs against the wall, and Alicia jumps. She snaps her journal shut and spins around in the desk chair. She’s not surprised to see Al in the doorway, but she _is _surprised to see Al wearing a black and red baseball jersey with a cartoon image of a devil over the left breast. Her Astros ball cap has been replaced with a black one, turned backwards. She has a baseball in one hand, a wooden bat in the other.

“Well?” Al says. “Don’t just stare at me. Come on.”

“What?”

“Get up,” Al insists. “We gotta get you dressed.”

“Dressed?”

Al rolls her eyes and starts to step forward, but Alicia hops up before she reaches the desk. Alicia motions for Al to go, and she follows after her. Al leads Alicia down into the stadium, far enough away from the gardens, and hands her an identical jersey – save for the number on the back – and a baseball hat. Alicia makes a point of pulling the hat on properly, with the brim facing the front, then slides her arms into the jersey.

“Why are we doing this?” Alicia asks.

“We’re going to have fun,” Al says. “We have your mom’s blessing as long as we don’t ruin the crops. So watch your swing.”

“My…what?”

Alicia realizes Al has even set up bases. Before she knows what’s happening, Al shoves a bat into Alicia’s hands and guides her to the home plate.

“You know how to swing a bat,” Al says. “Just hit the ball.”

Al picks up a glove and a baseball and heads to the mound. Alicia adjusts her hat nervously then prepares herself for the ball that’s about to come her way.

“We have to do this?” Alicia shouts.

“Yes!”

Alicia’s eyes flick to the stands. She spots her mother seated alongside Strand, Nick, and Luci. They’re all sharing a bag of popcorn, saved for a special occasion like this one.

“You ready?” Al calls.

Before Alicia can answer, behind her Charlie says, “Yeah!” Alicia jumps, turning back to spot Charlie behind her with a glove and a catcher’s mask pulled over her face. The mask is too big for her, and so is the glove, but as far as Alicia can tell, Charlie looks thrilled.

“Come on, Alicia!” Luci yells. “Kick her ass!”

Al shoots an indignant look toward the stands before letting the first ball fly. Alicia panics and swings, squeezing her eyes shut. She misses by a mile, and the ball lands squarely in Charlie’s glove.

“Strike one,” Charlie says.

“Watch it, kid,” Alicia warns.

Charlie grins and throws the ball back to Al. “You’re gonna have to do better than that, Alicia!” Al shouts. “Pay attention this time!”

Alicia grits her teeth and lifts the bat again. She’s going to hit this ball if it kills her – she’s going to send it straight into Al’s stupid, pretty face.

Wait, pretty?

The ball sails past Alicia again, and Al busts out laughing. Nick and Strand heckle Alicia from the stands. Nick throws a handful of popcorn down at them, and Luci wrestles the bag away from him before he can waste any more of it.

Jesus, Alicia needs to focus. Charlie returns the ball to Al again, and Al grins lopsidedly at Alicia.

“You ready this time?” she asks.

“Bring it,” Alicia replies. She nudges the hat farther up her head and makes herself focus. Al throws the ball, and Alicia swings, bracing herself for another miss. There’s a _crack_, and the ball rockets across the stadium. Luci cheers, and Alicia stands frozen at home plate.

“Alicia!” Charlie exclaims. “Run!”

Oh, right. Al’s running after the ball, so Alicia should start running, too. Her legs get the memo before her brain; she’s definitely _not _watching Al sprint in the direction of the ball. Alicia reaches first base by the time Al retrieves the ball, and she’s vaguely aware of Luci, Nick, Madison, and Strand all screaming at her to keep going. Alicia’s halfway to second when she realizes that not only does Al have the ball, but Al’s running right for her. She’s going to try to tag her out, since there’s no baseman to throw the ball to.

Okay, Alicia didn’t know this was going to be a serious thing. She pushes herself to run faster, reaching second just to hear Nick bellowing, “Third! Go for third!”

Alicia doesn’t stop. She hasn’t had to run like this in what feels like forever, and her legs already feel the burn. She knows Al’s converging on her, knows that she’ll reach her in a matter of seconds, but third base is _right there_ –

Alicia’s two steps from the plate when Al collides with her, sending both of them to the dirt. Alicia makes a small _oof _sound, and her hat goes flying from her head. Alicia briefly sees stars when her head smacks the ground, and she groans. When she finally blinks the stars away and clears her blurred vision, she stares straight into Al’s face, a whole three inches away from hers. Their legs are tangled together, and Al’s holding herself up with one hand, planted in the dirt beside Alicia’s head. Her other hand still has the ball in it, and Al taps it against Alicia’s shoulder, grinning.

“Gotcha,” Al says quietly.

Alicia groans again as Charlie excitedly shouts out, “You’re out!”

“You suck!” Nick jeers. Alicia sees Luci smack him in the arm out of the corner of her eye, but Nick laughs and gets his arm around her neck, pulling her into him. Alicia swallows and looks back up at Al, still grinning down at her.

“Okay,” Alicia says. “Get off me now.”

“As you wish.”

Al gets to her feet, lazily tosses the ball to Charlie, then offers Alicia both of her hands. Alicia takes Al’s hands and lets Al pull her back to her feet. Al makes sure Alicia’s steady before she bends over and scoops Alicia’s hat up, carefully placing it back on her head, brim facing forward.

“You alright?” Al asks. She brushes some of the dirt from Alicia’s jersey, but Alicia knocks her hands aside, blushing.

“I’m fine,” Alicia assures her. “Just a little pissed.”

“Pissed?”

Alicia smiles. “Yeah. I’m out.”

Al laughs. “Trade with Charlie,” she instructs. “Let the kid have a turn at bat.”

*

“_Ooh!_” Madison, Nick, Luciana, and Strand say in unison, cringing as Al loses her footing and runs right into Alicia. Madison gets to her feet as Luciana clings to Nick’s arm. After a moment, Al lifts her head and props herself up over Alicia on one hand. Her other hand still has the ball in it, and she knocks it against Alicia’s shoulder. If Alicia reached out, just above her head, she’d have touched third base.

“You’re out!” Charlie announces, bouncing up and down at home.

“You suck!” Nick shouts. Luciana hits him playfully, and he laughs and drags Luciana into him. They get into a playful shoving match as Strand crams popcorn into his mouth. Madison finally takes her seat again.

“Calm down,” Strand tells her. “They’re having fun.”

“Alicia could’ve gotten hurt,” Madison says.

“She’s fine,” Strand dismisses.

“Yeah, I bet she’s happy,” Luciana pipes up.

“Huh?” Madison says.

“Oh, come on,” Luciana laughs, motioning toward home plate where Al’s putting the catcher’s mask over Alicia’s face. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“Isn’t what obvious?” Madison asks.

“Yeah, babe, what are you talking about?” Nick says.

Luciana rolls her eyes. “You guys are so clueless.”

“What?” Nick says.

“Forget it,” Luciana replies. Madison watches Luciana exchange an amused look with Strand. Strand shrugs and passes the popcorn to Madison.

“Maybe you’re reading too far into it,” Strand says to Luciana.

“Into what?” Nick asks, but he’s ignored.

“You wanna bet?” Luciana says.

“Yes,” Strand says.

“Guys, knock it off,” Madison interjects. Alicia gets into position behind Charlie, and Al throws the first ball. She doesn’t pitch the way she had with Alicia. She goes easier on Charlie, throwing balls she knows Charlie has a chance at hitting. Charlie hits the second ball thrown to her, sends Al running across the stadium again. Al doesn’t sprint this time, and Charlie wisely comes to a stop at second base.

“Now what?” Charlie asks.

“Luci!” Al shouts. “Get down here! You’re up!”

“Come on,” Luci says, tugging Nick to his feet. “You guys, too. We’re playing baseball.”

“No, that’s okay,” Madison says, but Nick pulls her up, smiling.

“No, Mom,” he says. “You approved this, so you have to play.”

*

By the end of the baseball game, Alicia’s face hurts from smiling so much. When they call it quits, Al high-fives Charlie and rustles her hair. Even though Strand and her mom are nearby, Alicia can’t tear her eyes away from Al as she gives encouraging words to Charlie and offers her gentle pointers on her swing. Al lifts her ball cap from her head, runs her fingers through her sweat dampened hair, and pulls it back on. Alicia doesn’t think Al has stopped smiling since they collided at third.

To be fair, neither has Alicia.

“Good game, kid,” Strand says, clapping Alicia on the shoulder. She startles but manages to return Strand’s smile.

“Not really,” Alicia replies. “I sucked.”

“That’s okay,” Strand says. “You had fun.”

Alicia can’t deny that. Her eyes return to Al as she corrects the way Charlie’s holding the bat, but Nick and Luci catch her eye. They’re near Madison, and Nick loops his arms around Luci’s neck from behind, leaning his weight into her. She keeps them upright, leaning back into him as he leans in. She swallows hard, feels a strange pang in her chest, and looks away. Jake’s face flashes in her mind, but she shoves it back. Her eyes go back to Al.

“I think I’m gonna head in,” Alicia tells Strand. She pulls the baseball hat from her head and takes off the jersey, folding it neatly and setting both items aside. “It’s been a long day,” she adds.

“Take it easy,” Strand says, squeezing her shoulder.

Alicia pauses. “Do you think my mom had fun?”

Strand laughs hard, barely managing to nod. “She’ll never admit it,” he says.

Alicia smiles. She says goodnight to Strand and takes off for her apartment. For some reason, she doesn’t wait for anyone else. Doesn’t bid anyone else goodnight. She changes into shorts and a baggy T-shirt when she gets to her apartment and sits at her desk, pulling her journal back out. She flips to the last thing she wrote and stares at it for a long moment.

_Jake didn’t get it_.

Alicia picks up her pen.

_I don’t even know how long it’s been_, she writes on the line below her first sentence. _I still miss him _she adds. _Sometimes. I don’t know. But I think_

Alicia slams the journal shut when the door opens behind her, heart hammering in her throat. She chucks it into the drawer with the pen and swivels around. Her eyes lock onto Al, holding onto the doorknob with a deer-in-headlights look on her face.

“Everything good?” Al asks.

“What? Yeah,” Alicia says too quickly.

Al hums but nods and pulls the door shut behind her. She’s still wearing the ball cap and jersey, but she removes the hat as she steps fully into the apartment and tosses it on top of the dresser. She runs her fingers through her hair, exhaling heavily, then takes off the jersey. Alicia realizes she’s been staring at Al since she stepped into the apartment, and she should probably look away before Al calls her on it.

Al throws the jersey in the hamper then pulls her T-shirt over her head, flinging it toward the hamper but missing.

“Ah, shit,” Al says. “I guess this is why I never made my school’s basketball team.”

“You’re much better at baseball,” Alicia comments.

“I played softball,” Al says offhandedly. She goes to pick up her dirty shirt and place it in the hamper before she bothers to find a clean shirt to sleep in. Alicia wouldn’t dare to walk around the apartment in her bra while Al’s here, but Al doesn’t seem to care. In fact, she sheds her pants before crossing the room back to the dresser.

“Don’t tell me you were a pitcher,” Alicia says.

Al pulls a faded concert T-shirt over her head then smooths her hand over her hair. She grins at Alicia and shrugs. “I was. I think I’ve got my name on a plaque in my high school somewhere. I think they even managed to fit my whole name on the plaque, too.”

“What?” Alicia says.

Al laughs. “My name is Althea Szewczek-Przygocki. It’s a mouthful already, but try engraving it onto a little gold rectangle. Actually, I think they might have compromised and put _Al Szewczek-Przygocki_ instead.”

Alicia shakes her head. “That’s ridiculous.”

“What is? My name or the fact that I had it engraved on a plaque in high school?”

“Both.”

Al grins and pushes the drawer shut. Apparently she’s not putting pants on tonight. She leans against the drawer, facing Alicia, and says, “You played pretty well.”

Alicia snorts. “No, I didn’t. Charlie played better than me, and she’s, like, twelve.”

“Charlie has pent up kid energy,” Al says.

“Well, hopefully we wiped her out,” Alicia replies. She gets to her feet, pushes the desk chair in, and meets Al’s gaze. Alicia can’t help but smile, and Al returns it easily.

“What?” Al says.

Alicia shakes her head. “I just –” The words are in her head, but she can’t find a way to say them. Instead, she closes the distance between them and flings her arms around Al’s neck. Al startles slightly but gets her arms around Alicia’s waist, gently. “Thank you,” Alicia murmurs. “For today.”

“I – yeah. Of course.”

Alicia lingers for another few moments, eyes shut. Al doesn’t rush her, keeping her arms loose enough for Alicia to easily break through if she wants to. Alicia does finally pull back, but she hesitates halfway, her hands resting against Al’s neck. And it’s only then that Alicia realizes she’s accidentally placed her face mere inches from Al’s. They’re as close as the time when Alicia hit Al in the leg to get her to back off. Al, though, seems unperturbed. Alicia’s breath hitches in her throat, and she swallows hard as her eyes search Al’s. But she’s never been able to read Al.

“Alicia,” Al breathes.

Alicia can’t take it. She’s done talking. They’ve done plenty of that. Alicia grabs a fistful of the concert T-shirt at Al’s chest at the same time that she pushes her other hand to the back of Al’s head, using it to pull herself up the couple inches required to bring her lips to Al’s. But something stops her just short, and she finds herself hesitating when she’s so close, too close to back down now.

Alicia’s relieved when Al leans in to close the gap. She seems as eager as Alicia, thank _God_. Alicia feels Al’s fingers press against her hips, and Alicia’s hand curls into a fist in Al’s hair. Alicia can’t hold back a moan, and she can already feel the wetness pooling between her legs. She curses herself for being so damn easy and tightens her hold on Al’s shirt, suddenly afraid her legs are going to buckle beneath her.

Al pulls back just enough to whisper against Alicia’s lips, “Alicia, we should talk –”

“Do you want me or not?” Alicia blurts, surprising herself.

Al’s eyebrows raise, but she says, “Yes –”

“I want you too,” Alicia says bluntly. “There, we talked. Now do me a favor and _shut up_.”

Al nods and kisses Alicia again with a little more urgency. Al pulls Alicia’s shirt over her head in one swift movement then backs up just enough to yank her own off. Both articles of clothing end up somewhere on the floor. Al guides Alicia back to the bed, and Alicia’s quick to pull Al down on top of her.

Alicia’s shorts hit the floor, and she wills her mind to shut off.

*

Madison is only a little peeved that Alicia doesn’t show up at the new apartments in the morning. They had a fun night playing baseball. Surely Alicia is exhausted from the unusual sort of entertainment.

But still. Alicia could’ve given her a heads up.

Madison checks to make sure Alicia hasn’t simply followed Al to the gardens with Nick or even gone to work on the vehicles that need repairs. Frankly, Al’s nowhere in sight, either.

Madison gives them a pass, just this one time, because of the baseball game.

*

Alicia wakes up wrapped in warmth, and she sighs in contentment before her eyes are even open. There’s a body behind her, pressed against her, which Alicia determines is the source of the warmth. Al’s arm is secured against Alicia’s chest, a strong, comforting presence. Alicia can feel the steady rising and falling of Al’s chest against her back, and Alicia nearly drops back off into the best night’s sleep she’s had in, well, maybe years.

Alicia’s body jolts when her mind realizes _I’m supposed to be building apartments with my mother and instead I’m still naked in bed with Al_.

Al stirs behind her, groaning, and Alicia silently curses herself. “You alright?” Al mumbles. She wriggles her arm free from beneath Alicia’s and presses the heels of her hands against her eyes.

“Yeah,” Alicia says. “I just –”

“You regret it.”

“No!” Alicia exclaims. “No, seriously, but we’re supposed to be working. Right now. It’s a miracle my mom hasn’t come looking for us.”

Al, inexplicably, starts laughing. “Can you imagine?” she says. “If Madison walked in here right now?”

Alicia’s face heats up just at the thought. “No,” Alicia says. “I’d rather not imagine that, thanks.”

“I don’t see you getting up,” Al points out. “So you must not really be worried.”

“She would’ve come by now if she was going to,” Alicia mutters. “Maybe she’s cutting us some slack.”

“Good,” Al grunts. “My body hurts.”

“_Your _body hurts? Don’t even start with me,” Alicia replies. She throws the covers back, ignoring Al’s groan of protest. Alicia hurries to get clothes on and throws clothing Al’s way. “Come on,” Alicia says. She rips the sheets off of Al. “We need to shower and be productive members of the community before everyone notices our absence and gets suspicious.”

Al grins sleepily. “What? You’re afraid everyone will know we’re fucking?”

“No,” Alicia hisses. “I’m afraid _my mother _will find out once everyone knows that we’re fucking and kick my ass.”

“She won’t kick your ass,” Al dismisses. She finally sits up and pulls a shirt over her head. “She’ll kick mine,” Al says.

“Put your pants on and let’s go,” Alicia urges.

“Does this mean we’re not having shower sex?”

“No, we are,” Alicia says. “But we’re gonna make it fast then pretend like we’re exhausted from the baseball game last night, got it?”

Al grins. “Hand me my pants.”

*

Al and Alicia arrives three hours after they’re supposed to, freshly showered. Al is way too cheerful, and Alicia is grumpier than usual. They stand side-by-side in front of Madison, and as Al grins, Alicia mumbles an apology for oversleeping and being late.

“It’s alright,” Madison says. “There was a lot of excitement last night.”

“There sure was,” Al agrees. Somehow, her grin gets even wider. Madison thinks Alicia may have sunburned her face a little bit yesterday. It’s awfully red.

“That was a really good idea, Al,” Madison praises. “I’m hoping to set up a few more activities like that to really get everyone involved and lift our spirits. We do lots of work around here, but I think there’s room for some relaxation.”

“Oh, you bet,” Al says. “If you need any help, let me know.”

Madison smiles and nods then looks to Alicia. “So what’s it gonna be today?” Madison asks. “Building apartments or fixing cars?”

Alicia hesitates. “I’m gonna try to learn something new,” she decides. “But call if you need me, okay?”

Madison nods again. “Have fun,” she says.

“We will,” Al answers.

*

Al rolls under the truck, and Alicia lies in the patch of grass beside it so when she turns her head, she can see whatever Al’s doing under there. Every so often, Alicia plucks a weed from the grass and chucks it at Al, just to see the irritated look dance across her face as the weed smacks against her cheek.

“You were the one worried about being late, and you aren’t even working,” Al grumbles. “You’re just throwing shit at me.”

Alicia laughs, and Al grins in spite of herself. “Tell you what,” Alicia says. “You can have my turnips tonight.”

“Or you could just stop throwing weeds at me while I’m working.”

“What fun is that?”

Al slides out from under the car, smeared with grease again, and she steps around Alicia to get behind the wheel. She twists the key in the ignition and listens to the truck roar to life. She smiles to herself and kills the engine.

“At least we’ve got good news for Madison,” Al says. “The truck runs, but you haven’t learned a goddamn thing.”

Alicia laughs. “If my mom thinks I’m going to learn _anything _about cars, then she’s delusional.”

*

Madison doesn’t _spy _on Alicia per se, but she does keep tabs on her throughout the day. That’s not a hard thing to do, considering her first four hours down in the stadium are spent at the truck with Al, and Alicia lies in the grass and throws weeds at Al while she works. Alicia’s grouchy mood from earlier seems to have dissipated, and every time Madison gets eyes on her, she’s smiling.

Good. Alicia doesn’t smile enough. Tomorrow, though, Madison isn’t giving her a choice. They’re building apartments together.

*

If Alicia wasn’t at a table full of her friends and family, she’d tell Al to scoot the fuck over. Jesus, Al’s sitting with her thigh pressed to Alicia’s, much too close, but she doesn’t even seem to notice. She talks animatedly with Luci while Alicia tries to act like sitting this close to Al is normal for them. She swears she catches her mom staring at them once or twice, but she can’t be sure. Maybe she’s just being paranoid.

“Oh, hey,” Al says as dinner’s beginning to wind down. “Madison, I was hoping to work on a little project. You know, conduct interviews of everyone living here. Get the story behind this place and the people in it.”

Madison seems to think this over for a minute then smiles. “You know, I think that’s a great idea,” Madison says.

“You hear that?” Luci says, elbowing Nick in the side. “We get to be on camera.”

Dinner passes, and no one says anything about how close Alicia and Al were sitting. At least, no one says anything to Alicia’s face. She returns to the apartment with Al, and the second the door’s shut behind them, Al pulls her shirt over her head.

“What are you doing?” Alicia asks.

“Changing,” Al says pointedly. “I’ve still got grease on me. Get your mind out of the gutter, sweetheart.”

Al throws her a wink, but Alicia grits her teeth and says, “What did I say about calling me that?”

“I don’t know,” Al says. “I just remember getting hit in the leg for it.”

Alicia sighs and rubs at her temples as Al stands in front of her without a shirt on. Alicia crawls onto her bed, dropping down heavily on her side of the bed. She slides beneath the covers and says, “Put some clothes on and get in here.”

Instead, Al strips her pants off and gets under the covers in only her undergarments, securing her arms around Alicia. Alicia closes her eyes and leans back into Al, exhaling. Alicia links her fingers through Al’s over her stomach, feels Al drop her forehead against the back of her neck.

“You okay?” Al murmurs.

“Fine,” Alicia says.

“Are you lying?”

Alicia huffs. “Yes,” she says. “You’re very observant, Al.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Another lie.”

Alicia tightens her hold on Al’s hand and tries to find the right words. “Look, I just – this is a small community. Nothing stays secret for long in this place, and I –”

“Don’t want people to find out. I get it.”

“No,” Alicia says. “I don’t want everyone intruding on our business. I don’t – God, this is gonna sound so stupid.”

“Tell me anyway.”

“I don’t want to share you with anyone.”

Al chuckles, snuggles closer to Alicia, slips her leg between both of Alicia’s, and says, “You don’t have to.”

*

It’s funny how quickly things can fall apart. One minute, they’re eating dinner, laughing, enjoying themselves. The next, there are two trucks pulling trailers coming to a stop in the parking lot, just outside their gates. There’s a white flag secured to each trailer, one bearing a black number _57_, the other bearing a _45_.

“Madison!” Cole shouts. “Get over here!”

Madison rushes to the gates, taking the binoculars from Cole, and she sets them on the trucks. “Shit,” she curses. She shouldn’t be surprised to see Mel or Ennis step out of the two vehicles. Mel leads the way, walking briskly toward the gates. He might not even be armed, but Ennis definitely is.

“This is your last chance, Madison!” Mel shouts. “Hand over the girl, or we’re going to bring you down.”

“What do we do?” Cole asks.

Madison grits her teeth. “Sound the alarm.”

*

Alicia jolts awake from her unintended nap and immediately recognizes that sound. “Fuck!” she exclaims. She throws the covers back, throws Al’s arm off of her, and scrambles to her feet. “Al! Come on!” Alicia says, shaking Al awake. “That’s the alarm! We’re under attack!”

“What?” Al says, suddenly wide awake.

“Put your clothes on!” Alicia commands as she shoves her arms into her jacket. “And get a weapon, or two. Come on!”

Alicia grabs the butterfly knife and the Glock, unsure of what she’ll need most. Al quickly gets dressed and finds her trench spikes. Her eyes lock with Alicia’s, and without hesitation, Alicia grabs her by the front of the shirt and pulls her down to kiss her quickly, messily, then leads the way out the door.

*

By the time Alicia and Al join Madison at the gates, the parking lot is flooded with walkers. They scrape at the gates, and there’s already murmurs about breaking off into a caravan, escaping out the back.

“Naomi, Strand,” Madison says. “Get them under control. No one’s going anywhere. Nick and Luciana, protect Charlie. She’s one of us. Alicia and Al – you’re with me.”

Alicia and Al move to flank Madison at the gates, and they all stare out at Mel and Ennis, safe atop their truck, going entirely unnoticed by the dead. Mel actually seems rather bored, picking at his nails. Ennis, though, is enjoying the excitement.

“How do we do this?” Alicia asks, looking to Madison.

“One at a time,” Madison says. “That’s the only way we can do this.”

“And then what?” Al asks.

Madison meets Al’s gaze before looking back at Alicia. “Then we solve this problem once and for all,” Madison decides.

“You think the walls will hold?” Al asks. “Jesus, there’s got to be a hundred of them out there.”

Madison winces. “The walls will hold,” she assures Al. Hell, she’s half assuring herself, too. “Just don’t get bit. Cole! Pick off what you can. Don’t waste ammo.”

“And Mel and Ennis?” Cole questions.

“You leave them to me.”

*

“We’re the first line of defense,” Madison says. “And we want to be the last. We don’t want to let any through.”

Al and Alicia nod. Madison has forced the rest of the community back, placing Strand and Naomi in control. Everyone is armed, but Alicia knows their best fighters are the ones doing the dirty work. Nick and Luci have disappeared with Charlie.

“Are we ready?” Madison asks.

“Let’s do it,” Alicia agrees.

They get to work, jamming knife blades into the skulls of the walkers with their faces pressed against the gaps in the gates. With each walker that falls, another replaces it. Alicia shoves the butterfly knife into the top of another walker’s skull and nearly loses her grasp on it as the body starts to fall. At the last second, Alicia manages to yank the blade free and has to send it straight into the side of the skull of another walker before it gets its teeth in her wrist. Right when she wriggles her blade out again, someone grabs a handful of her jacket and pulls her back from the gate. Two walkers cram their face against the gap in the gate as Alicia stumbles backward.

Alicia whips around, but her anger fades when her eyes land on Al’s face. “Be careful,” Al warns.

“I am!” Alicia insists.

Al purses her lips. “I saw that,” she says. “Please, don’t get bitten over a knife.”

“It’s not _a knife_,” Alicia snaps.

“It’s a knife,” Al says gently. “Don’t choose it over your life.”

“Fine,” Alicia mutters. Her eyes shift over to her mom, dispatching walker after walker single handedly. Cole’s still at the top of the gate, picking off walkers one by one with his rifle. Alicia returns to her gap and kills two more walkers with a little more care than before. Al’s a few feet to her left, doing the same with the trench spike. Alicia watches Al shove it through a walker’s eye socket then yank the spike free swiftly, and maybe Alicia would swoon if there weren’t more walkers pushing their faces to the gate, trying to swipe at Alicia.

“We’re almost there!” Cole announces.

“Keep eyes on Mel and Ennis,” Madison orders. “I don’t want them to try anything.”

Alicia and Al exchange a glance. “If you’re going out there, I’m going with you,” Alicia blurts, snagging Madison’s attention.

“No,” Madison says. Her current walker falls, and to Alicia’s surprise, nothing steps up to take its place. “You’re staying here with Al,” Madison orders. “I’ll handle Mel.”

Alicia rushes over and grabs her mom by the sleeve of her jacket, pulling her back. “Mom,” Alicia says quietly. “Don’t go out there alone.”

Alicia hears complaints rise through the community behind her, and she glances back to see Nick shoving his way through people haphazardly. He jogs over, and Alicia spots a gun at his hip.

“I’ll go,” Nick volunteers. “Mom’s right. You should stay here with Al.”

“What? No!” Alicia protests. “I’m not staying here while you two go out there!”

Madison lays a hand on Alicia’s shoulder. “Let me protect you,” she says. “Just this one time. And if anything happens to us, you’re the next best person to take over for me. Stay here.”

Madison’s eyes lift to Al, and Al nods. She puts her hand on Alicia’s shoulder and squeezes, but it’s not a comforting gesture. It’s a warning. Alicia glares back at Al.

“Your mom’s right,” Al says. “Stay with me.” Al doesn’t say it, but her eyes do. _Please_.

Alicia concedes, and Madison gives Cole the command to open the gates. Al’s hand slips from Alicia’s shoulder, and they both brace themselves for any stragglers. Madison kills the nearest walker quickly, and Nick takes out a second, before they’re both strolling out toward Mel and Ennis. Alicia watches the two men climb down from their vehicles. Mel’s smiling, but Ennis has a nasty look on his face.

Al kills a walker that stumbles toward the open gates. Alicia lingers in the entrance with Al. She cleans the blood off the butterfly knife with the shirt of a nearby walker then slides it into her jacket pocket. She rests her hand against the Glock at her hip and looks to Al. Al tears her eyes away from Madison and Nick to meet Alicia’s gaze.

“Madison will handle it,” Al says.

Alicia grunts. “Don’t be so sure.”

*

“You killed all our walkers,” Mel says as Madison and Nick come to a stop a few feet away. “I’m impressed.”

“This is your last warning,” Madison says. “Leave. I’ve had enough of you trying to terrorize my community. You’ve lost. Go.”

Mel grins. “And if I don’t leave, Madison? Huh? If you were going to do something –”

Madison doesn’t even think. Her temper flares, and the next thing she knows, the blade of her knife is lodged in the center of Mel’s throat.

Somewhere behind her, Alicia screams.

*

Mel’s body collapses to the pavement. Madison stands, frozen, as Ennis presses the barrel of his gun to Nick’s chest and pulls the trigger. Madison still doesn’t move, and the next thing Alicia knows, she feels the kickback from the Glock in her hand, and Ennis falls to the ground beside Mel.

Madison unfreezes, finally, and rushes to Nick’s side, pressing her hands to his chest. Naomi sprints past Alicia and Al, Strand and Luci on her heels. The Glock clatters to the pavement at Alicia’s feet. Alicia doesn’t realize she’s screaming until Al clamps her hand over her mouth. Al’s other arm secures around her waist from behind, and Al hisses, “You’re going to bring more walkers to us.”

Alicia breaks Al’s grasp on her and runs to Nick’s side, shoving her way between Strand and her mom. Nick’s eyes find her, but they’re unfocused, and blood bubbles between his lips. Naomi’s hands are pressed over Madison’s, but blood continues to ooze from the bullet wound in his chest.

Alicia hears a groan behind her, and she pushes herself to her feet as Al finally reaches Nick’s side. The Glock’s back at the gate, but the butterfly knife is in her pocket. She stares down at Ennis, bleeding from the bullet Alicia put through his stomach. Ennis tries to sit up, to move away, but Alicia plants her boot against his chest and forces him back to the ground. Beside him, Mel has already bled out. Madison’s knife is still in his throat.

“Alicia, no!” Al shouts.

But it’s too late. Alicia puts the blade of the butterfly knife through Ennis’s ear with a sickening squelching sound. Alicia’s vaguely aware of Al’s approach, but Al doesn’t go for her. She yanks the knife from Mel’s throat in the seconds before his eyes reopen. Mel sits up, reaching for Al, and she brings Madison’s knife down into his skull with a grunt. Mel falls back, and Alicia pulls her knife free, swiping the blade across the front of Ennis’s shirt.

Al stares at Alicia for a long moment, Madison’s bloodied knife in her hand.

Luci’s sobbing draws both Alicia and Al’s eyes back to Nick, lying unmoving on the pavement, surrounded by Luci and Madison, Strand and Naomi. Luci cradles Nick’s head in her lap, and Madison sits back on the pavement, stunned, staring absently off at the sky. Naomi pulls her hands away from the wound in Nick’s chest, and Strand puts an arm around Madison. For a while, the only sound is Luci’s crying.

Alicia approaches Luci slowly. She flips the butterfly knife so the blade rests in her palm and holds it out to Luci. Luci looks up, cheeks streaked with tears, and she takes the butterfly knife from Alicia’s hand. Luci murmurs something in Spanish, closes Nick’s eyes gently, and lifts the blade.

Alicia looks away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this, we're looking at a short-ish epilogue, and this project will be wrapped up! Of course, I have to finish i know you feel it too (it all seems so untrue), but I've also started ANOTHER AU because I can't write one thing at a time apparently. And I know I promised an Al/Isabelle story a while back, but I am currently stalled on that front. But I hope to have something new (whatever it may be) out soon!
> 
> As always, thanks for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments, and I'll respond as quickly as possible!


	3. Chapter 3

Madison digs Nick’s grave herself. She doesn’t finish until the sun’s beginning to rise, and Alicia shuffles across the stadium with a cup of coffee in her hands. Madison doesn’t think she’s ever seen Alicia up this early willingly when there isn’t a run to go on. Cole and Strand are only just finishing gathering the bodies of the walkers and burning them away from the stadium. Naomi and Al have been taking turns sitting with Luciana, and Madison spots Al and Luciana passed out up in the stands, Luciana’s head resting on Al’s shoulder.

Alicia reaches Madison and holds the cup of coffee out. Madison stares at it, but Alicia insists and pushes it into her hands carefully. Alicia takes the shovel from Madison and sets it aside. Alicia hasn’t slept. Her eyes are bloodshot, puffy. She hasn’t changed out of her blood splattered clothes. No one has.

Alicia doesn’t say anything, but she does sit cross-legged in the patch of grass beside the grave. Madison reluctantly takes a seat next to her, and the ache begins to set into her muscles. The sunrise is gorgeous, though.

It’s not fair. The sun is rising, and it’s beautiful, but Madison’s son is dead.

Her daughter isn’t. Madison takes a sip of the coffee then hands Alicia the mug back. Madison is surprised that Alicia doesn’t fight it. She takes the mug and holds it, eyes set up on the sky.

“Alicia,” Madison says quietly. Alicia glances over at her, but her eyes soon shift over to the stands, to where Luciana’s finally sleeping after hours of crying. Madison had cried, too, and so had Alicia, but now they’re done. It’s over. They’re going to put Madison’s only son in the ground, and life will go on. But her daughter is here, and she needs her mother. So Madison reaches over and lays her hand on Alicia’s knee. “I’m sorry,” Madison says. “I should’ve said it a long time ago, and I know I owe you more than just an apology, but –”

“It’s okay, Mom,” Alicia interrupts softly. She’s still staring out at Luciana and Al.

“Things will be different,” Madison says.

“They already are,” Alicia mutters. She sips at the coffee, grimacing. “Is it terrible,” Alicia says, “that I feel worse about what Luci’s gonna go through now that she’s lost him than I do about his actual death?”

Madison exhales heavily. “I lost Travis,” she says bluntly. “You lost Jake – and Matt, at the very beginning. And now Luci has lost Nick –”

Alicia huffs, and Madison falls silent. “You know what I think that means?” Alicia says.

“What?”

Alicia smiles wryly. “We should all stop falling in love with men.”

Madison chuckles; she doesn’t have the energy for full laughter. She pats Alicia’s knee then pushes herself up in spite of her protesting muscles. She picks the shovel back up and hops down into the grave to keep going.

Alicia finishes the coffee, swallows hard, then says, “Mom, Al and I –”

“I know,” Madison cuts in. She pauses, leaning against the shovel for support, and smiles at the confused look on Alicia’s face. “Luci filled us in,” Madison adds. “She caught on first.”

“Damn her,” Alicia says.

Madison grins. “You’re happy?” she asks.

“Yeah.”

Madison nods. “Well, you won’t be for much longer,” she says. “Not once the news spreads through the community. They’re going to watch you like hawks and gossip about you, the way they did about Nick and Luci. And remember when Natalie and Damon broke up? It was all anyone talked about for _weeks_.”

Alicia groans and hides her face in her hands. “Why is everyone in this place so damn nosy?” she complains.

“Because all we do is work,” Madison answers. “They need to do something for fun.”

Alicia blinks. “We’re definitely setting up regular baseball games now,” she says.

“I’ll make it happen,” Madison promises. “It’s the least I can do.”

*

Alicia watches her mom finish Nick’s grave. She watches Luci sleep with her head on Al’s shoulder – and she watches Al sleep with her head tilted back against the seat, jaw hanging open, her arm wrapped around the back of Luci’s seat. She watches Cole and Strand return to the stadium and secure the gates behind them. Alicia watches the sun until it rises then gets to her feet.

The entire community gathers around. Alicia stands at Nick’s graveside with her mother, Luci, Al, and Strand. Madison leans on Strand, and Alicia chances entwining her fingers with Al’s. Luci stands on Al’s other side, sniffling and clutching at her arm. Madison covers the grave with dirt, and Charlie walks up and shakily lays a handful of flowers over the site, marked with a wooden headstone that Jeff constructed overnight. He even carved _Nick Clark _into it.

Madison touches her fingertips to the dirt as the community disperses then stands and touches her fingertips to Alicia’s cheek. Al’s hand slips from Alicia’s so she can properly hug Luci, who’s been launched back into full sobbing, and Alicia gives her mother her full attention. She looks like she wants to say something, but Madison hesitates.

“Mom?” Alicia prompts.

“No one’s gone until they’re gone,” Madison says. It’s such an odd thing to say, and Alicia’s eyebrows pull together.

“I don’t –” Alicia begins, but Madison shakes her head.

“It’s okay,” Madison says. “I’ve spent so much time not seeing _you_. I have done so many things wrong, Alicia, and now, Nick is _gone_, but you aren’t. You’re here, and I – I can be better. For you.”

“Mom, it’s –”

“It’s not okay,” Madison says. “My son is dead. I don’t want you to be next.”

Alicia nods. She doesn’t know what to say to that, so she hugs her mom tightly and closes her eyes.

“Is now a bad time to promote you?” Madison asks.

“Yes,” Alicia laughs. She pulls back from the hug, her eyes shiny. “I think I need a day off.”

Madison nods. “Take it.”

Alicia hesitates, glancing over her shoulder. Al’s still comforting Luci, distracted enough not to be paying attention to Alicia’s conversation. “Mom,” Alicia says. “I saw the tape that Al has of you. The one where you told the story about Amina.”

Alicia doesn’t know how to gauge her mom’s reaction, but after a few moments, Madison nods. “You saw that.”

“I did. And we’re not – I mean, I’m not – that person anymore. But I, um, I don’t think you’ve completely lost…me, at least.”

Madison nods solemnly. “It’s not because of this place,” Madison says. “I thought this would be what we needed, but I was wrong. You’re a good person, Alicia.”

Alicia smiles and shifts her weight from foot to foot awkwardly. “We can stop having this conversation now, Mom. It’s the weirdest conversation we’ve ever had, I think.”

Madison laughs. “Okay,” she agrees. “I’m going to talk to Al about keeping those tapes of hers private.”

*

_Three Months Later_

Madison steps back from the apartment she’s just finished – the last one, she hopes. At least for now. She thought she was going to have to build one more, but Al decided to stay in Alicia’s. Madison spots Al now, monitoring the gardens she inherited from Nick. She’s saying something to Luci, waving her hand around over the crops. Luci nods, says something back, then catches Madison’s eye.

Luci smiles and points Al toward Madison. Al turns, squinting against the sunlight, but she remembers their arrangement and leaves the garden.

“Madison,” Al calls. “You ready?”

“As ready as ever, I suppose,” Madison answers. “Now that the last apartment is finished.”

Al smiles. “Where’s Alicia?”

“Checking our perimeter,” Madison says.

Al hums. “I can’t believe you put her in charge of security.”

Madison shrugs. “She’s good at it.”

Al nods. “Come on. I’ve got the perfect place.”

*

“Mom, do you copy?” Alicia says into the walkie. She’s flanked by Strand and Cole, both carrying assault rifles, but their perimeter is uncompromised. The fence they’d erected outside of the parking lot is holding up perfectly.

“I copy,” Madison says.

“Everything’s looking good,” Alicia informs.

“Great,” Madison replies. “Just give me a half hour or so and we’ll plan the next run, okay?”

“Got it,” Alicia says. She hooks the walkie back on her belt and turns to face Strand and Cole. She smiles.

*

Madison takes a seat in the folding chair Al set up amongst the gardens. Luci heads off to meet up with Alicia – to distract her, really. Al gets the camera set up as Madison shifts in her seat nervously. Al pulls her baseball hat from her head, runs her fingers through her sweat dampened hair, then puts the hat back on and turns her attention to Madison.

“Are you ready?” she asks.

“Yes.”

Al nods and gets the camera rolling. “Alright,” Al says. “Start by telling me your name, where you’re from, and what you’ve seen.”

Madison clears her throat. “My name is Madison Clark. I was born in Montgomery, but I lived in California when everything went down. And, um, I’ve seen too much to recount.”

“Then tell me about this community you’ve built,” Al prompts.

“This is the Dell Diamond Baseball Stadium,” Madison explains. “With a lot of help from my friends – and my children – we’ve managed to turn this place into something more.”

“What’d you turn it into?”

“A home.”

Al smiles. “Madison, why don’t you tell me about your kids?”

“That’s a funny question coming from you, Al,” Madison says. “You probably know Alicia better than I do at this point.”

“You know she goes through my tapes,” Al says. “What would you want her to know if she saw this?”

Madison takes a deep breath and manages a shaky smile. She wrings her hands in her lap and thinks for a moment. “Just that I love her,” Madison says. “And that I would do anything for her. I’m so proud of everything she’s done.”

Al nods. “Anything else?”

“This place is only a home because we’re here together,” Madison says. “We’ve survived hardships, losses we never thought we’d move on from. But we’ve made it this far. And I need Alicia to know that I won’t give up, no matter what happens. I’ll fight for her until the very end.”

*

Alicia’s asleep in the center of the bed when Al returns to the apartment. Al smiles to herself and sets the camera down on the desk. She pops the tape out, places it back in its case, and uncaps a Sharpie. She sticks a piece of masking tape across the edge and carefully writes _Madison_ on it. Al tucks the tape in the drawer for the time being. Alicia can watch it after Al completes Alicia’s first interview.

Al pulls her hat from her head and changes out of her dirty clothes. Alicia stirs when Al lowers herself onto the bed, and she smiles sleepily and rolls right into Al’s arms, nestling her face against Al’s chest.

“How’d it go?” Alicia mumbles.

“She told me a lot more than I expected,” Al admits. “You can see it after I get your interview.”

Alicia chuckles and tries to snuggle closer to Al even though they’re already pressed up against each other. Al closes her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This project is officially finished! Thanks for reading and for sharing your thoughts with me! I hope you enjoyed it! I'll definitely still be writing, so stay tuned!


End file.
